Im in a situation and needs others' thoughts
ImSoReal
Members Posts: 2,009
ok, I had a gut feeling that my girl was still talking to one of her exes. Not necessarily that she was messing with him, but just still in contact at the very least. He had called her a few weeks back, I saw the name on her phone, but she didnt pick up. I later asked her about it and she told me he was calling to tell her that he was happy that she found someone and that all he wanted was for her to be happy. Well supposedly he had contacted her sister first then her. What I dont know is if he left this on her vm, or if she talked to him another day, or if her sister told her that the ex told her this and she passed it on.
well a couple nights ago I go onto my girl facebook (I dont have a facebook). Well my girl page is on private, but im still able to look at her friends. Well this dude is on her friends list. So I have a hard time believing there is no contact between the 2 of them. Mind you this guy wanted to marry her a few years back and her entire family was trying to get her to marry him, but she says she didnt love him like that so they broke up. So she wanted to know why I have been so distant the last few days so I told her. Well I asked her if there was something she needed to tell me about her ex. She claims she has done nothing wrong and hasnt talked to him. I have a hard time believing that he is on her friends list and doesnt contact her.
Should I tell her that I went to her facebook and saw that the guy was a friend on her page. She may not think its a big deal to me, which is why she didnt mention it, but I personally feel like thats something I should know. My gut is telling me there is something she isnt telling me
well a couple nights ago I go onto my girl facebook (I dont have a facebook). Well my girl page is on private, but im still able to look at her friends. Well this dude is on her friends list. So I have a hard time believing there is no contact between the 2 of them. Mind you this guy wanted to marry her a few years back and her entire family was trying to get her to marry him, but she says she didnt love him like that so they broke up. So she wanted to know why I have been so distant the last few days so I told her. Well I asked her if there was something she needed to tell me about her ex. She claims she has done nothing wrong and hasnt talked to him. I have a hard time believing that he is on her friends list and doesnt contact her.
Should I tell her that I went to her facebook and saw that the guy was a friend on her page. She may not think its a big deal to me, which is why she didnt mention it, but I personally feel like thats something I should know. My gut is telling me there is something she isnt telling me
Comments
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honestly in my experience most women keep in touch with there exes....this one girl im talking to (were not dating ) but we have been friends for years now...she keeps pictures of her exes (even the ones that did her ? ) she talks to them on the phone every now and again and shes facebook friends with them...I think with most females it is innocent enough but the exes usually have other things in mind. and for some reason females never see why men have a problem with this. even if it is just friendly banter I deem it disrespectful b/c I would never keep in contact with and ex after I have moved on. I suggest if u have a major problem with it like I think you do tell her just be honest and see what her response is and judge it from there.
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You need to calm down before you chase her off.
I have exes on my FB and I never even talk to them.
Besides, do you think not having him on her friends list is going to stop her from ? with him if thats what she wants to do?
She probably leaves him on there so his soul can burn slow when he sees she's moved on and is happy without his ass. -
you share that girl
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youre on it .... just continue to stay on top of it
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I honestly think when most women keep in touch with their exes its innocent....I just dont understand why they do it or feel the need to. but I also know for a fact that when they see exes out their exes are still tryna ? even if thier not.
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everything but the last sentence is good ? . keep your friends and enemies closeYou need to calm down before you chase her off.
I have exes on my FB and I never even talk to them.
Besides, do you think not having him on her friends list is going to stop her from ? with him if thats what she wants to do?
She probably leaves him on there so his soul can burn slow when he sees she's moved on and is happy without his ass. -
You need to calm down before you chase her off.
I have exes on my FB and I never even talk to them.
Besides, do you think not having him on her friends list is going to stop her from ? with him if thats what she wants to do?
She probably leaves him on there so his soul can burn slow when he sees she's moved on and is happy without his ass.
i understand she can mess with him regardless if he is on her page or not....but when someone tells me I have no contact with any of my exes i wouldnt expect them to still have their ex on their facebook. maybe she is like you where she doesnt talk to them but still keeps them on but why? I mean if you post ? about us he knows it. I guess I just live by a different motto once im done with a girl im done and there are no traces left. I would have just liked some sort of notice....because like I said when someone tells me I have no contact or nothing like that with an ex I wouldnt expect them on your facebook regarldless if u talk or not
I guess I just never understood why u would keep the ex on facebook...plus her sister is still chatting with him...something just seems off. Ive been in a similar situation before and my gut instinct was right...not trying to go down that lane again -
copperkid27 wrote: »I honestly think when most women keep in touch with their exes its innocent....I just dont understand why they do it or feel the need to. but I also know for a fact that when they see exes out their exes are still tryna ? even if thier not.
exactly I dont understand why stay in contact with an ex unless you want to keep them around as an emergency type of thing, why have them in your business like that -
Kat does your man know u have exes on your facebook
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i understand she can mess with him regardless if he is on her page or not....but when someone tells me I have no contact with any of my exes i wouldnt expect them to still have their ex on their facebook. maybe she is like you where she doesnt talk to them but still keeps them on but why? I mean if you post ? about us he knows it. I guess I just live by a different motto once im done with a girl im done and there are no traces left. I would have just liked some sort of notice....because like I said when someone tells me I have no contact or nothing like that with an ex I wouldnt expect them on your facebook regarldless if u talk or not
I guess I just never understood why u would keep the ex on facebook...plus her sister is still chatting with him...something just seems off. Ive been in a similar situation before and my gut instinct was right...not trying to go down that lane again
Is having him on her page actually considered contact though?
I have my ex on mine but if my man asked if I've contacted him I could honestly say no.
I would be more concerned with the phone call, but you can't fault her for someone calling her phone. Most anytime you get in a new relationship you gotta give some space and time for previous people to get the idea and move on... especially in this case where it seems it was kinda serious.
Just keep your eyes open for REAL signs..not ? you're imagining because of your own insecurities, like her sister talking to him. How can she control that? -
ok, I had a gut feeling that my girl was still talking to one of her exes. Not necessarily that she was messing with him, but just still in contact at the very least. He had called her a few weeks back, I saw the name on her phone, but she didnt pick up. I later asked her about it and she told me he was calling to tell her that he was happy that she found someone and that all he wanted was for her to be happy. Well supposedly he had contacted her sister first then her. What I dont know is if he left this on her vm, or if she talked to him another day, or if her sister told her that the ex told her this and she passed it on.
well a couple nights ago I go onto my girl facebook (I dont have a facebook). Well my girl page is on private, but im still able to look at her friends. Well this dude is on her friends list. So I have a hard time believing there is no contact between the 2 of them. Mind you this guy wanted to marry her a few years back and her entire family was trying to get her to marry him, but she says she didnt love him like that so they broke up. So she wanted to know why I have been so distant the last few days so I told her. Well I asked her if there was something she needed to tell me about her ex. She claims she has done nothing wrong and hasnt talked to him. I have a hard time believing that he is on her friends list and doesnt contact her.
Should I tell her that I went to her facebook and saw that the guy was a friend on her page. She may not think its a big deal to me, which is why she didnt mention it, but I personally feel like thats something I should know. My gut is telling me there is something she isnt telling me
The first question you should ask yoruself is:
Are you opposed to sharing that girl?
IF so, ask her to cut off all contact, or just hack her facebook for her password, then you can know the real deal. -
Kat does your man know u have exes on your facebook
Umm..he's never asked, but he has his baby mama on his sooo..I wouldn't care if he did know. It's not like I ever talk to them. -
Umm..he's never asked, but he has his baby mama on his sooo..I wouldn't care if he did know. It's not like I ever talk to them.
so that means no......... -
Is having him on her page actually considered contact though?
I have my ex on mine but if my man asked if I've contacted him I could honestly say no.
I would be more concerned with the phone call, but you can't fault her for someone calling her phone. Most anytime you get in a new relationship you gotta give some space and time for previous people to get the idea and move on... especially in this case where it seems it was kinda serious.
Just keep your eyes open for REAL signs..not ? you're imagining because of your own insecurities, like her sister talking to him. How can she control that?
once again I understand that I cant control everything but once again does your man know u have exes on your facebook. I just feel like why not the head up..say hey i do have an ex on my facebook page but we dont talk. I still dont understand why u would have an ex on your page...females have a tendency to keep exes somewhat in their lives where as dudes usually cut them completely out, your ex shouldnt be knowing your moves, but being on facebook that is possible. ? just seems fishy...i will just end the ? -
so that means no.........
If he asked I'd tell him, but am I just supposed to randomly tell him that?
He'd be like oookay, and the he'd probably get suspicious cause I felt the need to tell him out of the blue.
So yes, that means no. -
Umm..he's never asked, but he has his baby mama on his sooo..I wouldn't care if he did know. It's not like I ever talk to them.
so if u dont talk to them why have them on your facebook? atleast he has contact with his babymomma, i still think its a bad idea
plus like I said her entire family was trying to get her to marry this dude and know i find out the sister still talks to him....im keeping my eye open but im a very blunt and open person. When my ex called me i answered in front of my girl and told her I was in a relationship and for her not to call me anymore. Her she just lets it rings and then talks to him when im not around....sorry suspect ? -
dark I will say this...
If I had an ex on my page that was actively pursuing me with phone calls etc and it was causing a rift in my current relationship, then he would not be on my page. -
dark I will say this...
If I had an ex on my page that was actively pursuing me with phone calls etc and it was causing a rift in my current relationship, then he would not be on my page.
gotcha, but once again if they are ur ex, why keep them on ur page in the first place? -
I guess im just flipping because im the type of dude that I tell my girl things even when she doesnt ask....if I feel like she needs to know it I will let her know it....where as her I have to ask. I just feel like the whole situation is fishy and I wouldnt even know what I know without asking. I dont know whats the truth,
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Keeping an ex on your page, keeps the option open of contact, etc.
Its why i dont have Facebook. Cuz if i stay in contact with an ex, ima smash.
Its probably why you dont have a facebook too.
Women keep exes on facebook for two reasons, to son him, or to be with him again.imo. -
gotcha, but once again if they are ur ex, why keep them on ur page in the first place?
There are different reasons.
For me, my ex was my friend. I don't want to talk to him or contact him cause I already know he'd try to smash and it would annoy me, but I can't lie and say I'm not curious about how he's doing, I cared about him for a long time. -
There are different reasons.
For me, my ex was my friend. I don't want to talk to him or contact him cause I already know he'd try to smash and it would annoy me, but I can't lie and say I'm not curious about how he's doing, I cared about him for a long time.
ding ding ding....so my girl probably feels this way about her ex....like I said she was crazy about this guy and says he is one of the best men she has ever met....and everyone called her a fool for not marrying him and to see that she keeps him around I cant get with that. Id rather not go down that aisle again where I give the woman the benefit of the doubt -
ding ding ding....so my girl probably feels this way about her ex....like I said she was crazy about this guy and says he is one of the best men she has ever met....and everyone called her a fool for not marrying him and to see that she keeps him around I cant get with that. Id rather not go down that aisle again where I give the woman the benefit of the doubt
agreed. confront her. -
Keeping an ex on your page, keeps the option open of contact, etc.
Its why i dont have Facebook. Cuz if i stay in contact with an ex, ima smash.
Its probably why you dont have a facebook too.
Women keep exes on facebook for two reasons, to son him, or to be with him again.imo.
or they could just forget/not think about it. i don't have fb but there's a few numbers in my phone i have yet to delete simply because i never give any thought to it. -
y'all really serious about this facebook ? out'chea??
idk if this will make you feel any better, but i got prolly at least 500 FB friends and i MIGHT talk to about 15 of 'em.
FB aint the problem. if you don't trust her, keep ya eyes open or confront her about it, but don't let it be because she has her ex as a FB friend, you're gonna look silly, B
