Why I raise my children without ? .
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When my son was around 3 years old, he used to ask me a lot of questions about heaven. Where is it? How do people walk without a body? How will I find you? You know the questions that kids ask.
For over a year, I lied to him and made up stories that I didn’t believe about heaven. Like most parents, I love my child so much that I didn’t want him to be scared. I wanted him to feel safe and loved and full of hope. But the trade-off was that I would have to make stuff up, and I would have to brainwash him into believing stories that didn’t make sense, stories that I didn’t believe either.
One day he would know this, and he would not trust my judgment. He would know that I built an elaborate tale—not unlike the one we tell children about Santa—to explain the inconsistent and illogical legend of ? .
And so I thought it was only right to be honest with my children. I am a non-believer, and for years I’ve been on the fringe in my community. As a blogger, though, I’ve found that there are many other parents out there like me. We are creating the next generation of kids, and there is a wave of young agnostics, atheists, free thinkers and humanists rising up through the ranks who will, hopefully, lower our nation’s religious fever.
Here are a few of the reasons why I am raising my children without ? .
? is a bad parent and role model.
If ? is our father, then he is not a good parent. Good parents don’t allow their children to inflict harm on others. Good people don’t stand by and watch horrible acts committed against innocent men, women and children. They don’t condone violence and abuse. “He has given us free will,” you say? Our children have free will, but we still step in and guide them.
? is not logical.
How many times have you heard, “Why did ? allow this to happen?” And this: “It’s not for us to understand.” Translate: We don’t understand, so we will not think about it or deal with the issue. Take for example the senseless tragedy in Newtown. Rather than address the problem of guns in America, we defer responsibility to ? . He had a reason. He wanted more angels. Only he knows why. We write poems saying that we told ? to leave our schools. Now he’s making us pay the price. If there is a good, all-knowing, all-powerful ? who loves his children, does it make sense that he would allow murders, child abuse, wars, brutal beatings, torture and millions of heinous acts to be committed throughout the history of mankind? Doesn’t this go against everything Christ taught us in the New Testament?
The question we should be asking is this: “Why did we allow this to happen?” How can we fix this? No imaginary person is going to give us the answers or tell us why. Only we have the ability to be logical and to problem solve, and we should not abdicate these responsibilities to “? ” just because a topic is tough or uncomfortable to address.
? is not fair.
If ? is fair, then why does he answer the silly prayers of some while allowing other, serious requests, to go unanswered? I have known people who pray that they can find money to buy new furniture. (Answered.) I have known people who pray to ? to help them win a soccer match. (Answered.) Why are the prayers of parents with dying children not answered?
If ? is fair, then why are some babies born with heart defects, autism, missing limbs or conjoined to another baby? Clearly, all men are not created equally. Why is a good man beaten senseless on the street while an evil man finds great wealth taking advantage of others? This is not fair. A game maker who allows luck to rule mankind’s existence has not created a fair game.
? does not protect the innocent.
He does not keep our children safe. As a society, we stand up and speak for those who cannot. We protect our little ones as much as possible. When a child is kidnapped, we work together to find the child. We do not tolerate abuse and neglect. Why can’t ? , with all his powers of omnipotence, protect the innocent?
? is not present.
He is not here. Telling our children to love a person they cannot see, smell, touch or hear does not make sense. It means that we teach children to love an image, an image that lives only in their imaginations. What we teach them, in effect, is to love an idea that we have created, one that is based in our fears and our hopes.
? Does Not Teach Children to Be Good
A child should make moral choices for the right reasons. Telling him that he must behave because ? is watching means that his morality will be externally focused rather than internally structured. It’s like telling a child to behave or Santa won’t bring presents. When we take ? out of the picture, we place responsibility of doing the right thing onto the shoulders of our children. No, they won’t go to heaven or rule their own planets when they die, but they can sleep better at night. They will make their family proud. They will feel better about who they are. They will be decent people.
? Teaches Narcissism
“? has a plan for you.” Telling kids there is a big guy in the sky who has a special path for them makes children narcissistic; it makes them think the world is at their disposal and that, no matter what happens, it doesn’t really matter because ? is in control. That gives kids a sense of false security and creates selfishness. “No matter what I do, ? loves me and forgives me. He knows my purpose. I am special.” The irony is that, while we tell this story to our kids, other children are abused and murdered, starved and neglected. All part of ? ’s plan, right?
When we raise kids without ? , we tell them the truth—we are no more special than the next creature. We are just a very, very small part of a big, big machine–whether that machine is nature or society–the influence we have is minuscule. The realization of our insignificance gives us a true sense of humbleness.
I understand why people need ? . I understand why people need heaven. It is terrifying to think that we are all alone in this universe, that one day we—along with the children we love so much—will cease to exist. The idea of ? and an afterlife gives many of us structure, community and hope.
I do not want religion to go away. I only want religion to be kept at home or in church where it belongs. It’s a personal effect, like a toothbrush or a pair of shoes. It’s not something to be used or worn by strangers. I want my children to be free not to believe and to know that our schools and our government will make decisions based on what is logical, just and fair—not on what they believe an imaginary ? wants.
Comments
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Didn't read, but it's probably some good ? .
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Good ? .
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Platinum thread push
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The narcissism ? is on point.
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I think saying for certainity a deity doesn't exist is still lying cause you don't know that there is a deity or not. That is hugely arrogant in my book, but I would tell them to look it up for themselves and come up with their own answers and beliefs.
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Atheists are almost as pushy as the damn Jehovah witness
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I was about to post something like that too b..? might as well start handing pamphlets in ? in front of walgreensCopperKing wrote: »Atheists are almost as pushy as the damn Jehovah witness
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Saying something exists without any proof is lying, because you have no facts or any basis to fall back on to support your claim.
To claim something doesn't exist, because it doesn't have any factual evidence, isn't lying but the truth.
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White Jesus dont love black kids
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Religious heads telling me im going to certain places bc im a certain way unless i believe in what they believe in and atheist telling me ? doesn't exist bc bad things happen...how bout yall shut the ? up and let me believe in what i believe in unless i ask for ur damn opinion
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You will always have at least two sides to things, like it or not, people will share their views and opinions on them.
I liked this article so I posted it to share.
LOL @ this article being flagged over and over and them having to edit in asking them NOT to flag it. -
some people think with more emotion/spirituality than logic.
its like knowing when someone is lying but u dont have any proof. does it mean u are wrong? not necessarily. but u go by your gut feeling and i think some, not all, believers really believe what they feel while the rest are just comfortable with it or were raised that way.
personally i dont believe in religion but im not quick to believe there isnt a higher being or energy that put everything in its place and i do believe in spirituality and being able to sense other peoples energy. -
i think carl sagan said it the best i've ever heard
"An atheist is someone who is certain that ? does not exist, someone who has compelling evidence against the existence of ? . I know of no such compelling evidence. Because ? can be relegated to remote times and places and to ultimate causes, we would have to know a great deal more about the universe than we do now to be sure that no such ? exists.
To be certain of the existence of ? and to be certain of the nonexistence of ? seem to me to be the confident extremes in a subject so riddled with doubt and uncertainty as to inspire very little confidence indeed."
Some people think ? is an outsized, light-skinned male with a long white beard, sitting on a throne somewhere up there in the sky, busily tallying the fall of every sparrow. Others considered ? to be essentially the sum total of the physical laws which describe the universe.
I do not know of any compelling evidence for anthropomorphic patriarchs controlling human destiny from some hidden celestial vantage point, but it would be madness to deny the existence of physical laws
I see what he's saying. It is true, "? " isn't only a biblical figure, "? " is simply a title. So you can attach the title "? " to anything. -
im not a believer but i raise my kids as believers
teaches em good morals and values and ? -
Human race cant even travel past their own moon... yet gonna rule out the existence of universal beings
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the funny thing about people is that once they convince themselves of something....they dismiss the smallest possibility that they could ever be wrong.....
people are born ignorant....but education makes them stupid.... -
CopperKing wrote: »Human race cant even travel past their own moon... yet gonna rule out the existence of universal beings
i kinda find it hard to believe its a ? in the sky playin the sims with my life -
You have the free will to say that
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No disrespect to all my fellow IC constituents but I dont think you understand the POV of an atheist...(using and atheist as an example)
•first of all... to a theist (if your a theist) ANY! and I mean ANY.. big or little criticism against a ? that you love.. That you've built your life around...will always feel and sound like an attack.
• Secondly...do you realize that atheist are surrounded by theist all damn day .. 75% being christian in the states.. right.. We gotta hear about this ? ? all damn day from everywhere!.. ... We cant escape that ? ... N*ggas be on facebook talking that ? or praising ? at the award shows (like nygga get outta here wts.) We gotta hear that ? from a bunch of hypocritical mafuckas.... like clearly you obviously in NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM live your life Christ like...(all you do is pray when you need some ? ) but who am I to judge.
Its like a black man trying to escape the essence of racism or some ? .
So yeah it may seem like Atheist are pushy (and some are because theres always a fringe element within a certain group) but nyggas finally can actually speak out without feeling shunned... especially in the Black community where people love them some ? and jesus. -
CopperKing wrote: »Atheists are almost as pushy as the damn Jehovah witness
speaking of such...........
http://firstchurchofatheism.com
First Church of Atheism
As a legally ordained minister, you will be able to perform weddings, funerals, commitment ceremonies, and other functions that are reserved for members of clergy.
The First Church of Atheism wants you to pursue and cherish your realistic beliefs without interference from any outside agency, including government or church authority. We provide our service for free, as we believe it is every atheists right to perform these clergy functions. -
CopperKing wrote: »Human race cant even travel past their own moon... yet gonna rule out the existence of universal beings
i kinda find it hard to believe its a ? in the sky playin the sims with my life
I find it hard to believe that there is a gigantic ball of gas in space that has been burning for millions of years, a planet so large that that ball of gas cant be seen if next to it or the fact that gigantic meat eating lizards roamed the earth...doest mean it ain't true -
CopperKing wrote: »CopperKing wrote: »Human race cant even travel past their own moon... y to bet gonna rule out the existence of universal beings
i kinda find it hard to believe its a ? in the sky playin the sims with my life
I find it hard to believe that there is a gigantic ball of gas in space that has been burning for millions of years, a planet so large that that ball of gas cant be seen if next to it or the fact that gigantic meat eating lizards roamed the earth...doest mean it ain't true
ok believe what you believe
dinosaurs aint real either, but i iant gon get into that
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CopperKing wrote: »CopperKing wrote: »Human race cant even travel past their own moon... yet gonna rule out the existence of universal beings
i kinda find it hard to believe its a ? in the sky playin the sims with my life
I find it hard to believe that there is a gigantic ball of gas in space that has been burning for millions of years, a planet so large that that ball of gas cant be seen if next to it or the fact that gigantic meat eating lizards roamed the earth...doest mean it ain't true
There's proof for this though, so if you truly don't believe it (which I know you're using an example, a poor one at that) then you're being ignorant to the proof. -
Ahh Yes...but there was a time when there was not proof and if u were to say those things in public ud be put in a straight jacket
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Believes ? doesn't exist but doesn't have proof.
Believes ? is real and exist but doesn't have proof.
Same group of people no matter how you look at it.
Just in case this was over looked.
This discussion has been closed.