Man arrested for having explosive diarrhea
r.prince18
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The 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals last week upheld a conviction against a Maine man who served a seven-day jail sentence for willfully damaging and creating a hazard and nuisance in the federal courthouse in Portland. Specifically, he pooped his pants and then left a mess in the bathroom after attempting to clean himself up.
And what a mess. The poor maintenance worker who had to deal with it said that “seventy-five percent of the floor was covered in feces” while more was “smeared more than two feet up on the walls” and “on the paper towel and toilet paper dispensers, on the toilet paper itself, and on part of the toilet seat and the left side of the toilet bowl,” according to the opinion.
The outrageously graphic 57-page court document, written by distinguished judges who sit one level below the U.S. Supreme Court, includes vivid comparisons to spaghetti with meat sauce and chunky peanut butter. There are also photos of the bathroom where the crime took place, though mercifully after it had already been cleaned.
So what went wrong? Ronald Strong, who said he was 50 at the time and had a heart condition that required medication that may have affected his bowel control, arrived at the courthouse on business for an unrelated civil case. As he was being screened by security, he informed the guard that he had to use the bathroom, and then that he was defecating in his pants. The guard escorted him to the restroom “with Strong intermittently trailing feces on the floor” which he later described as “liquid and there was pieces in it” that dripped down his leg “all the way to my ankles.”
Once safe in the bathroom, he took his clothes off, cleaned up the best he could, throwing his boxers away because they were destroyed: “I mean, how could I carry them home?” he testified. “What was I going to put them in? I mean, it was covered in feces, there was — I mean, what was – I mean, I had my briefcase, I mean, what was I supposed to do with them? I threw them in the trash.”
After washing up at the sink the best he could, he exited the bathroom, took care of his official business and left the building. It wasn’t until a law enforcement officer tried to use the restroom 15 minutes later that the disaster was discovered.
When he was hauled back into court, Strong’s defense was two-fold — one, he didn’t mean to cause the mess, and two, there were no clearly visible signs warning that it was illegal to befoul the bathroom.
The court rejected both, first noting that signs prohibiting damage, hazards and nuisance were posted clearly inside the building. As for intent, they held that he willfully made the mess, reasoning that it was so extensive that no mere accident could be that catastrophic.
http://www.salon.com/2013/07/26/found_guilty_of_the_worst_bowel_movement_ever/
And what a mess. The poor maintenance worker who had to deal with it said that “seventy-five percent of the floor was covered in feces” while more was “smeared more than two feet up on the walls” and “on the paper towel and toilet paper dispensers, on the toilet paper itself, and on part of the toilet seat and the left side of the toilet bowl,” according to the opinion.
The outrageously graphic 57-page court document, written by distinguished judges who sit one level below the U.S. Supreme Court, includes vivid comparisons to spaghetti with meat sauce and chunky peanut butter. There are also photos of the bathroom where the crime took place, though mercifully after it had already been cleaned.
So what went wrong? Ronald Strong, who said he was 50 at the time and had a heart condition that required medication that may have affected his bowel control, arrived at the courthouse on business for an unrelated civil case. As he was being screened by security, he informed the guard that he had to use the bathroom, and then that he was defecating in his pants. The guard escorted him to the restroom “with Strong intermittently trailing feces on the floor” which he later described as “liquid and there was pieces in it” that dripped down his leg “all the way to my ankles.”
Once safe in the bathroom, he took his clothes off, cleaned up the best he could, throwing his boxers away because they were destroyed: “I mean, how could I carry them home?” he testified. “What was I going to put them in? I mean, it was covered in feces, there was — I mean, what was – I mean, I had my briefcase, I mean, what was I supposed to do with them? I threw them in the trash.”
After washing up at the sink the best he could, he exited the bathroom, took care of his official business and left the building. It wasn’t until a law enforcement officer tried to use the restroom 15 minutes later that the disaster was discovered.
When he was hauled back into court, Strong’s defense was two-fold — one, he didn’t mean to cause the mess, and two, there were no clearly visible signs warning that it was illegal to befoul the bathroom.
The court rejected both, first noting that signs prohibiting damage, hazards and nuisance were posted clearly inside the building. As for intent, they held that he willfully made the mess, reasoning that it was so extensive that no mere accident could be that catastrophic.
http://www.salon.com/2013/07/26/found_guilty_of_the_worst_bowel_movement_ever/
Comments
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Hahaha!! Where the gif gangstas at? Need that, "I hope they serve beer in hell " gif
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r.prince18 wrote: »The outrageously graphic 57-page court document, written by distinguished judges who sit one level below the U.S. Supreme Court, includes vivid comparisons to spaghetti with meat sauce and chunky peanut butter. There are also photos of the bathroom where the crime took place, though mercifully after it had already been cleaned.
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? thread
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this ? is real? i always thought because of the word explosive it was a joke. damn @ 75% of of the floor smeared. is this a medical condition? how does one prevent this from ever happening?
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this ? is real? i always thought because of the word explosive it was a joke. damn @ 75% of of the floor smeared. is this a medical condition? how does one prevent this from ever happening?
You don't throw a fit like a 2yr old and paint the walls and floor with your own ? . -
this ? is real? i always thought because of the word explosive it was a joke. damn @ 75% of of the floor smeared. is this a medical condition? how does one prevent this from ever happening?
Nice play on words there. -
I believe what happened is that he was actively ? his pants, and as such, when he turned to the right (because most people are right handed) to turn around to sit on the toilet, ? sprayed only the left side of the toilet. This man is innocent.
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Well aint that some ? . Pun intended
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That trial should be on court tv
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Didn't even read the post gave you a lol just off the title.
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Cant say that no ? were giving.
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*dead* at this ? , ? was stuttering and all kinds of ? .
Once safe in the bathroom, he took his clothes off, cleaned up the best he could, throwing his boxers away because they were destroyed: “I mean, how could I carry them home?” he testified. “What was I going to put them in? I mean, it was covered in feces, there was — I mean, what was – I mean, I had my briefcase, I mean, what was I supposed to do with them? I threw them in the trash.” -
Malicious ? distribution
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Oh ? @ this story...literally.
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explosives are explosives but ? situation nonetheless
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? bacteriotherapy is when feces from a close relative or spouse are given to patients suffering from intractable diarrhea caused by Clostridium difficile. The purpose is to repopulate the intestines with the normal gut flora (intestinal bacteria) to decimate the clostridium. The healthy stool is administered by nasogastric tube, enema, or in a capsule.
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For him to cover 75% of the floor.
The bathroom was probably one of those public(private) bathrooms. (Bathroom open to the public, but only meant to be used by one person at a time)
Keep lolling at that ? hobbling to the bathroom while leaving a trail of ? in the courthouse
I can imagine all this taking place with this playing.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MHvE0_xhLbs -
r.prince18 wrote: »After washing up at the sink the best he could, he exited the bathroom, took care of his official business and left the building. It wasn’t until a law enforcement officer tried to use the restroom 15 minutes later that the disaster was discovered.
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The cop probably walked in and saw that ? and was like
he realized he stepped in some ? and stripped and ran out looking like this
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[img]http://www.randomlolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Sneeze-? -? -Hall-Pass-Movie.gif[/img]