Clairvoyant Chronicles Vol 1: How I got Robbed

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clairvoyance
clairvoyance Members Posts: 2,751 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited May 2016 in The Battle Rap Zone
Once upon a time there was rap battle between Goldie and Clairvoyant and Goldie won 6votes to Voyant's '0'. Clairvoyant was in disbelief cause apparently Goldie's Hulk Hogan and duck duck goose bar was enough to win. Now clairvoyant had lost before but never to such mediocre bars. He had given credit to 'lookdude' and 'sagewonder' for they're victories 'justifiably' but this was different. So weeks later he decided to do a bar breakdown of his own verse to put his mind at ease.........

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  • clairvoyance
    clairvoyance Members Posts: 2,751 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2016
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    Aight Goldie,lets set the record straight,just cause you make comments that are outrageous and ridiculous
    Don't mean that your lines can trump mines,when they fall behind,on some apprentice sh**
    Don't think you know who you dealing with,so please be humble

    (Donald Trump is known for making outrageous comments and use to have a show called apprentice)

    You moderate cool,but dont tolerate fools,or cats with raps that are boring
    Leave you with a suit taylor made threaded in this casket that I laid straight for him

    Y'all know the forum that he runs and the threads that he make
    Claims he got a real life,but it's always a new tournament thats up for a debate
    How you call yourself gold,when everything about you is fake
    You the wizard hiding behind the curtain,always talking sh** while lurking behind drapes
    Yeah the 22nd is the day I ? you, couldn't wait

    Im tuned up,I got the bars on auto,I'm zoning
    If you don't brace yourself,your neck might get broken
    Snap my fingers,that's a hit,like I'm Corleoning
    Take you out from a distance thats Vasily without reloading

    (Tuned up like a car/Auto Zone-Car shop,Auto-Bars ready to go,Zoning-in the zone/Blacking out behind the bars/wheel,Neck Brace-worn after 'car'accidents,Neck broken if he doesn't prepare(brace) himsef for these bars coming at him like a car at full speed)

    (Enemy at the Gates - movie about a sniper named Vassili that shot and killed German Army soldiers from a distance just like the Corleone family when they put hits out in Godfather

    That's right I'm a movie buff,that's L.C.A.
    Lights Camera Action,take a fraction straight from your brain

    Just a portion
    Pinky to my mouth like I'm bossin,fly like Austin,you know shaggy and flossin
    You're not a member Gold,only a few sons could hang with the coldest

    (Austin Power refrences,Gold Member movie)-

    Few sons/fusion(wordplay how I pronounced it in audio)/son/slang
    Also 'few sons' is refrencing Gold member Dr Evils 'son' (Scott Evil)who wanted his dads approval and wanted to be just like him but Doc favored mini-me instead for the most part-So only a few sons could hang wit me and the coldest lyrical battle rappers
    Coldest/Fusion - Dr Evil tried to takeover the world with a 'cold' fusion


    I mean I'm sorry,but didn't I tell ya
    He's been putting on act since forever,he ain't real,you Iggy Azaelea
    You already extinct,scalp your head for my memorabilia
    What's your condition?no heart,you was born as a failure

    (Act Since/Iggy Azaleas fake controversial 'Accent and coincidentally guest appeared on a song called 'forever'
    (Heart Condition/Heart Failure)

    Destined to lose
    Even if you pushed me to the Max,I still wouldn't walk in your shoes -

    (The Cobbler movie - Adam ? played Max who wore and walked in other peoples shoes)

    That's not how I step,I'm a let these bars connect, like magnets
    You can either get ate or salvaged
    Unlike Craig, I know how to store food in my cabinets -

    (Referring to goldie as food/Friday movie - Craig couldn't find anything to eat except cereal

    So if you talk trash,I got smacks
    You want waves,you get capped
    Ask Smokey,don't provoke me
    Always carry them two things that match

    (Friday movie - Smokey said "y'all aint never got two things that match" - So I named two of everything - smacks for trash talking,wavecaps for your hair/capped as in shot - Always carry two guns that match - overall short scheme)


    See you gotta learn how to coordinate,you back down,it's too late
    What goes around comes back around like a boomerang and my mark is too seal your fate

    (John Witherspoon quote from the movie Boomerang - Mark is/Marcus name of Eddie Murphy's character in boomerang)

    And if he's hiding,I'll find him and go to any and whichever hole he's in
    The boy blew,then step to his mom like Zod and crip toe any and whichever house she's in

    (quote from Zod in 'Man of Steel' movie - Blew/Blue as in color of costume/Color of crips-Crip toe/Tip toe-Kryptonian-Zod stepped to Clarks surrogate mother looking for him

    Cause you've been dodging me,you must wanna be from Brooklyn
    Acting like Fredo,guess you knew my mic will ? ya
    And I'm not Sicilian
    When you drop sixteen,these bars crash cotillions
    You want more lines, I got millions
    I can tell by your reaction, you already in your feelings

    (Brooklyn Dodgers)
    (Godfather major spoiler)-
    Mic/Microphone/Mike as in Michael had his brother 'Fredo' killed after fredo was 'dodging'/hiding from him out of fear for his life
    (Mic/Mike was Sicilian
    16 bars/16yrs old,Cotillions is a banquet/party for a girl 'goldie' who turns 16yrs old,my bars crash his 16 bars like crashing a party/cotillion
    IC feelings reaction button
    )

    But hey....
    I guess that's how a b*%¢# moderator trolls,when you put him on hold,all he can do is push buttons
    The way y'all move is disgusting

    (Personals/Shots fired)
    (After I put Biz on ignore he was flagging and hitting feelings on my every post out of spite)

    You back down after you pop sh**,I make polls, who busy locking it
    Somebody give me the cue,to knock these two cornballs down the corner pocket

    (Goldie backed down 'first' cause he said he has a "real life",Busy/Biz locked one of my threads for no reason after goldie admitted it wasn't him,Cue/Signal/Cue ball/Pool ? /2 Cornballs as in Goldie and Biz/Corner pocket/Pool)

    No Espn,but I can see an end to gold,plummets,your stocks down,you already know your finished
    No need to broadcast these headlines when I killed you for all eyes to witness,

    (Short TV network Scheme)
    (Espn shows pool tournaments,CNN,Gold plummet/stock market,Broadcast headlines like the news,Eye Witness News/IC members watching me beat Goldie in battle)

    your lies suspicious
    I see no growth in your bars,there's no evolution,you need to get with fitness
    These lines come around like a spin move,with the quickness,like I got that Michael Jackson spirit,now ask me can I feel it

    (Fitness Evolution,Jackson 5 has a song called 'can you feel it)

    Just a tad but you aint bad,you ain't nothing,you already know your sorry
    Your bars are played,plus you can get the fade...like Mike Lowry

    (Michael Jackson said that to Wesley Snipes in the 'BAD' video BadBoys movie)

    And if that line was to predictable,try and catch this one,you might sound stupid
    But I don't need you to spot a bar Gold,at the gym,your just about useless

    (Spotter for bench press,Golds Gym)

    You can't out rap me,even a treadmill could show who's the fastest,you hold no weight,you better off taking Zumba classes

    (Jokes-Zumba is a dance class mainly for females at the gym)


    You must wear glasses if you thought you can see me
    You'll need a extra pair of four eyes to win(Geechie Slim wears glasses-four eyes),chances still be slim, with ghostwrites from the likes of Geechie


    Now is he Drizzy(drake presumed to have ghostwriters) or just don't have the rhythm to get busy,can't walk tall(Walking Tall movie-Rock/Dwayne)with me man,Dwayne Johnson with these hands,that's how I rock milli
    The glove a (donald glover)make your face turn purple(color purple),that's how you get rocked silly(Cealy/whoopie goldberg)
    Make you sing soprano(tv series/type of singer)for acting like he was made(Made Men/mafia)) really
    Can't sit with King Arthur and my sword,try out for the team, I'll cut your ass plenty -(self explanatory)


  • _Goldie_
    _Goldie_ Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 30,349 Regulator
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  • clairvoyance
    clairvoyance Members Posts: 2,751 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2016
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    GoldieTV wrote: »
    tumblr_lxvnb73bI01qcfba3o1_500.gif

    Wheres those other bars you mention besides the hogan bar to breakdown..dont worry I'll wait....

    Goldie - "Clair dont have what it take
    Cant see me wit da hands,im playing patty cake
    Across your face
    Thats Tic Tac Toe bro, you'll always be last place"

    Bars!
  • Sage Wonder
    Sage Wonder Members Posts: 3,413 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    lmaoo damn homie you bottling up anger and regrets that ? not healthy for you playa


    but 100% i was trying to be sincere when giving you criticism. Give me a little bit i'm going to respond to your breakdown so you can see what i was trying to say.
  • Sage Wonder
    Sage Wonder Members Posts: 3,413 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I actually have to make this two posts. Never even knew there was a character limit.

    You can do either one of two things. Read this, get sensitive and catch feelings like you are prone to do.... or take my criticism for what its worth whether you agree or not and maybe internalize within your own self how you can improve.

    Aight Goldie,lets set the record straight,just cause you make comments that are outrageous and ridiculous
    Don't mean that your lines can trump mines,when they fall behind,on some apprentice sh**
    Don't think you know who you dealing with,so please be humble

    (Donald Trump is known for making outrageous comments and use to have a show called apprentice)


    I caught the Trump apprentice bar first listen/read. Where is the punchline though? Saying the word trump and apprentice doesn't make an appreciable connection. You suggested a set up and wasted it.
    You moderate cool,but dont tolerate fools,or cats with raps that are boring
    Leave you with a suit taylor made threaded in this casket that I laid straight for him

    Y'all know the forum that he runs and the threads that he make
    Claims he got a real life,but it's always a new tournament thats up for a debate
    How you call yourself gold,when everything about you is fake
    You the wizard hiding behind the curtain,always talking sh** while lurking behind drapes
    Yeah the 22nd is the day I ? you, couldn't wait

    So all of this is filler? Only thing you could say is the claims he got a real life, always got a new tournament thats up for debate... "thats up for debate" could go for a double entendre, real life/up 4 debate tournaments/up 4 debate. This would have made for a solid side bar or set up, but doesn't carry enough for a punchline

    How you call yourself gold, everything about you is fake. You tried to make this a punch but it's completely weightless. Not very thought out. Again, a filler set up bar that you tried to make a punchline.

    Im tuned up,I got the bars on auto,I'm zoning

    You know I caught this because I called you out on the lack of effort on utilizing this scheme. Is this a punch line? Perfect opportunity to set up a Chilla-esque scheme but you settled for this
    If you don't brace yourself,your neck might get broken

    Is this a punchline? Not very creative. Not hard. Not direct. It's weightless.
    Snap my fingers,that's a hit,like I'm Corleoning
    Take you out from a distance thats Vasily without reloading

    I honestly did not know what this meant until I googled Vasily. Even now knowing it, it's just OK. Bar structure could've made this better.

    That's right I'm a movie buff,that's L.C.A.
    Lights Camera Action,take a fraction straight from your brain

    Just a portion
    Pinky to my mouth like I'm bossin,fly like Austin,you know shaggy and flossin
    You're not a member Gold,only a few sons could hang with the coldest

    Pinky to my mouth like I'm bossing -- This was hard?? The ? ? Why you even write this lol
    Also don't understand how you go from bossin, austin, flossin... coldest.
    I caught the Austin Power reference, though I didn't know about a cold fusion i never watched that wack movie lol
    The last bar was thought out so I give you points to that. It's actually a solid bar, for a set up or if you worked the scheme better. Left to be desired imo.

    I mean I'm sorry,but didn't I tell ya
    He's been putting on act since forever,he ain't real,you Iggy Azaelea

    This was hard? I'm asking you.

    You already extinct,scalp your head for my memorabilia
    What's your condition?no heart,you was born as a failure

    This was decent, probably could've been worded better but i like it. This is assuming you intended a double entendre with "no heart" after that set up.
    Destined to lose
    Even if you pushed me to the Max,I still wouldn't walk in your shoes -

    This was hard? Filler.


    That's not how I step,I'm a let these bars connect, like magnets

    Not creative you don't get points for these type of similies
    You can either get ate or salvaged
    Unlike Craig, I know how to store food in my cabinets -

    This was hard? Filler.
    So if you talk trash,I got smacks
    You want waves,you get capped
    Ask Smokey,don't provoke me
    Always carry them two things that match

    Lol you can gtfoh with that explanation you tried to play off there is no real connection here. Filler.
  • Sage Wonder
    Sage Wonder Members Posts: 3,413 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2016
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    See you gotta learn how to coordinate,you back down,it's too late
    What goes around comes back around like a boomerang and my mark is too seal your fate

    I peep that the first part is a segue from the "two things that match", w/e. The second part (also true for the first part) is filler. Let me make this point here cuz you may not be following my thinking. Bar structure.

    Simply putting together a word here and a word there to pass as a metaphor is not what makes a good bar. How you word the bar is everything. How you preface the bar, and how you land it. It's like a jab, jab, hook. A bar like this I would liken to a limp wristed swing. Yeah you let something go, but it had no weight behind that throw.

    Where is there a tangible punch line? Btw yes I know you are scheming movies following the LCA subforum mention but all of these are filler bars you could've scrapped.

    And if he's hiding,I'll find him and go to any and whichever hole he's in
    The boy blew,then step to his mom like Zod and crip toe any and whichever house she's in


    I'm getting bored -_- (just keeping a 100)


    Cause you've been dodging me,you must wanna be from Brooklyn
    Acting like Fredo,guess you knew my micwill ? ya
    And I'm not Sicilian
    When you drop sixteen,these bars crash cotillions
    You want more lines, I got millions
    I can tell by your reaction[/], you already in your feelings[/b]


    Where. is. the. mother. ? . punchline.

    But hey....
    I guess that's how a b*%¢# moderator trolls,when you put him on hold,all he can do is push buttons[/b]
    The way y'all move is disgusting

    Scrap this
    You back down after you pop sh**,I make polls, who busy locking it
    Somebody give me the cue,to knock these two cornballs down the corner pocket

    Yeah yeah cue, corner pocket. Not a punch line.

    No Espn,but I can see an end to gold,plummets,your stocks down,you already know your finished
    No need to broadcast these headlines when I killed you for all eyes to witness,

    Meh. Could've been better if you took more time structuring your wording.
    your lies suspicious
    I see no growth in your bars,there's no evolution,you need to get with fitness
    These lines come around like a spin move,with the quickness,like I got that Michael Jackson spirit,now ask me can I feel it

    You just putting words together. Not a punch line.

    Just a tad but you aint bad,you ain't nothing, you already know your sorry
    Your bars are played,plus you can get the fade...like Mike Lowry

    Meh

    And if that line was to predictable,try and catch this one,you might sound stupid
    But I don't need you to spot a bar Gold,at the gym,your just about useless

    Wording makes this better.

    You can't out rap me,even a treadmill could show who's the fastest,you hold no weight,you better off taking Zumba classes

    You said this is a joke but aint no body laughing ? damnit

    You must wear glasses if you thought you can see me
    You'll need a extra pair of four eyes to win(Geechie Slim wears glasses/four eyes),chances still be slim, with ghostwrites from the likes of Geechie

    Ehh. Could've been a decent set up for something better.

    Now is he Drizzy(drake presumed to have ghostwriters) or just don't have the rhythm to get busy,can't walk tall(Walking Tall movie-Rock/Dwayne)with me man,Dwayne Johnson with these hands,that's how I rock milli
    The glove a (donald glover)make your face turn purple(color purple),that's how you get rocked silly(Cealy/whoopie goldberg)
    Make you sing soprano(tv series/type of singer)for acting like he was made(Made Men/mafia)) really
    Can't sit with King Arthur and my sword,try out for the team, I'll cut your ass plenty -(self explanatory)

    Yeah you just putting words together.



    To keep it 100, yeah goldie's verse was light. He didn't need to do too much to get a clear win over you. I knew it, he knew it, everybody that peeped the battle knew it. He literally could have just dropped the Hogan bar and nothing else and still won. Get sensitive if you want to I'm just being honest.
  • DOPEdweebz
    DOPEdweebz Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 29,364 Regulator
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    Clair is the weirdest most delusional ? of all time that we all laugh at.
  • Trollio
    Trollio Members Posts: 25,815 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    you ? get no ?
  • Micmacmar3of3m
    Micmacmar3of3m Members Posts: 1,316 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Trollio wrote: »
    you ? get no ?

    Ha!!
  • Trillaaaaaa
    Trillaaaaaa Members Posts: 8,974 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Clair...bro half your ? don't even rhyme
  • DOPEdweebz
    DOPEdweebz Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 29,364 Regulator
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    Clair...bro half your ? don't even rhyme
    This ? got turnt into a sending.
This discussion has been closed.