Fellas and Women in a relationship, need some real help

1234568

Comments

  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    blacktux wrote: »
    Westie so confrontational.

    Yall ever seen her bow out knowing she wrong?

    the ? told yall in the other thread the other day she loves to argue.. not like.. but LOVE!!
    im willin to bet the ? know she wrong..
    but turn down a good argument for what!!?

    It never fails.

    I aint even talking to the ? and he never misses an opportunity to call me out my name. shouldnt you be in a pink caddy somewhere ? ? Shoo.
  • blackrain
    blackrain Members, Moderators Posts: 27,269 Regulator
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    blackrain wrote: »
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    @BOSSExcellence is right, there's some lesbians on here pretending to be men

    What man wouldn't tell another man to dip out on a chick complaining about sex 6 months into a relationship

    Y'all making excuses for her, talking about hormones, that aint what she said, she said this ? treat her like a sex object

    Let's stick to the facts and not project or "live in la la land"

    You do know that hormones can affect her feeling like he's treating her like a sex object right? You do know how hormones work and affect your mood don't you?

    bro let's not make assumptions, you have no clue what kind of birth control she is on, and bc can cause the sex drive to go either way, so let's stick to facts, bro said she complains about him not her and he admits he has a high sex drive

    He didn't say she wasn't in the mood or that she doesn't be down to ? , from what threadstarter is saying the problem sounds like they're sexually incompatible, and he asked advice on what to do next

    And its a fact that hormonal changes can affect your mood which means something that normally wouldn't bother or upset you now will...meaning him having a higher sex drive may not be viewed as a problem by her if her hormones weren't being ? with
  • silverfoxx
    silverfoxx Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 11,704 ✭✭✭✭✭
    blackrain wrote: »
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    blackrain wrote: »
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    @BOSSExcellence is right, there's some lesbians on here pretending to be men

    What man wouldn't tell another man to dip out on a chick complaining about sex 6 months into a relationship

    Y'all making excuses for her, talking about hormones, that aint what she said, she said this ? treat her like a sex object

    Let's stick to the facts and not project or "live in la la land"

    You do know that hormones can affect her feeling like he's treating her like a sex object right? You do know how hormones work and affect your mood don't you?

    bro let's not make assumptions, you have no clue what kind of birth control she is on, and bc can cause the sex drive to go either way, so let's stick to facts, bro said she complains about him not her and he admits he has a high sex drive

    He didn't say she wasn't in the mood or that she doesn't be down to ? , from what threadstarter is saying the problem sounds like they're sexually incompatible, and he asked advice on what to do next

    And its a fact that hormonal changes can affect your mood which means something that normally wouldn't bother or upset you now will...meaning him having a higher sex drive may not be viewed as a problem by her if her hormones weren't being ? with

    Just to add, my girl gets hella moody after 12 at night every night.
  • 2stepz_ahead
    2stepz_ahead Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 32,324 ✭✭✭✭✭
    silverfoxx wrote: »
    blackrain wrote: »
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    blackrain wrote: »
    Ol Jay's wrote: »
    @BOSSExcellence is right, there's some lesbians on here pretending to be men

    What man wouldn't tell another man to dip out on a chick complaining about sex 6 months into a relationship

    Y'all making excuses for her, talking about hormones, that aint what she said, she said this ? treat her like a sex object

    Let's stick to the facts and not project or "live in la la land"

    You do know that hormones can affect her feeling like he's treating her like a sex object right? You do know how hormones work and affect your mood don't you?

    bro let's not make assumptions, you have no clue what kind of birth control she is on, and bc can cause the sex drive to go either way, so let's stick to facts, bro said she complains about him not her and he admits he has a high sex drive

    He didn't say she wasn't in the mood or that she doesn't be down to ? , from what threadstarter is saying the problem sounds like they're sexually incompatible, and he asked advice on what to do next

    And its a fact that hormonal changes can affect your mood which means something that normally wouldn't bother or upset you now will...meaning him having a higher sex drive may not be viewed as a problem by her if her hormones weren't being ? with

    Just to add, my girl gets hella moody after 12 at night every night.

    ? she tired.....

    or a gremlin.

    imma say she tired
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Westie wrote: »
    As usual someone with a ? trying to tell a woman with a ? , having sex with that ? how her ? is supposed to feel.

    For the record I did not start this Part conversation and I will not be responsible for the direction it turns.

    Having a ? doesn't make you right. Nor does it mean your experience is valid. Some people "experience" UFO's, that doesn't make the claim legitimate. Nothing you said really conflicts with the body of literature that shows cougar culture and the Myth of middle age sexual primacy are phenomena that arise as social constructions rather than biological ones. You implied that his girl is yet to reach her prime as though its some kind of objective fact about people rather than a very murky, manufactured one.

    Shirk responsibility all you want, the view you put forward is outdated and not well supported by the research
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited July 2017
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    As usual someone with a ? trying to tell a woman with a ? , having sex with that ? how her ? is supposed to feel.

    For the record I did not start this Part conversation and I will not be responsible for the direction it turns.

    Having a ? doesn't make you right. Nor does it mean your experience is valid. Some people "experience" UFO's, that doesn't make the claim legitimate. Nothing you said really conflicts with the body of literature that shows cougar culture and the Myth of middle age sexual primacy are phenomena that arise as social constructions rather than biological ones. You implied that his girl is yet to reach her prime as though its some kind of objective fact about people rather than a very murky, manufactured one.

    Shirk responsibility all you want, the view you put forward is outdated and not well supported by the research

    My experience is invalid? Huh? How? You tell me, what does my ? do? What has my sex life been like?

    And shirk responsibility? Huh? What are you even talking about ???

    And show me the studies you've done.
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0 Regulator
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • Preach2Teach
    Preach2Teach Members Posts: 3,429 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Give her a gentle slow kiss after you have finished having sex, look her in the eyes and channel your inner Barry White voice and say "thank you baby" if you don't know who Barry White is you should look into that.
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    As usual someone with a ? trying to tell a woman with a ? , having sex with that ? how her ? is supposed to feel.

    For the record I did not start this Part conversation and I will not be responsible for the direction it turns.

    Having a ? doesn't make you right. Nor does it mean your experience is valid. Some people "experience" UFO's, that doesn't make the claim legitimate. Nothing you said really conflicts with the body of literature that shows cougar culture and the Myth of middle age sexual primacy are phenomena that arise as social constructions rather than biological ones. You implied that his girl is yet to reach her prime as though its some kind of objective fact about people rather than a very murky, manufactured one.

    Shirk responsibility all you want, the view you put forward is outdated and not well supported by the research

    My experience is invalid? Huh? How? You tell me, what does my ? do? What has my sex life been like?

    And shirk responsibility? Huh? What are you even talking about ???

    And show me the studies you've done.

    Your experience tells us about your experience. It doesn't necessarily reveal anything truthful about the objective world. Using an anecdote about what YOU experienced, to then extrapolate about OP's lady, who you do not even have experience of to begin with, is not a strong inference. Particularly when it promotes a contentious view of sexuality that is way outdated.

    If women were really in their sexual prime as they got older why does the risk of autism go through the roof as the age of motherhood increases?
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    As usual someone with a ? trying to tell a woman with a ? , having sex with that ? how her ? is supposed to feel.

    For the record I did not start this Part conversation and I will not be responsible for the direction it turns.

    Having a ? doesn't make you right. Nor does it mean your experience is valid. Some people "experience" UFO's, that doesn't make the claim legitimate. Nothing you said really conflicts with the body of literature that shows cougar culture and the Myth of middle age sexual primacy are phenomena that arise as social constructions rather than biological ones. You implied that his girl is yet to reach her prime as though its some kind of objective fact about people rather than a very murky, manufactured one.

    Shirk responsibility all you want, the view you put forward is outdated and not well supported by the research

    My experience is invalid? Huh? How? You tell me, what does my ? do? What has my sex life been like?

    And shirk responsibility? Huh? What are you even talking about ???

    And show me the studies you've done.

    Your experience tells us about your experience. It doesn't necessarily reveal anything truthful about the objective world. Using an anecdote about what YOU experienced, to then extrapolate about OP's lady, who you do not even have experience of to begin with, is not a strong inference. Particularly when it promotes a contentious view of sexuality that is way outdated.

    If women were really in their sexual prime as they got older why does the risk of autism go through the roof as the age of motherhood increases?

    Still waiting for the answers to my questions.
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile

    You told me to take responsibility.

    And you researched what?

    I get you can't back up your argument.
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile

    You told me to take responsibility.

    And you researched what?

    I get you can't back up your argument.

    It's very easy to back up. In "Is there an early-30s peak in female sexual desire? Cross-sectional evidence from the United States and Canada", the authors found that men in one sample experienced a sexual peak that conflicts with what you said to OP. Moreover, the support they found that bolsters the old Kinsey view for a later female sexual prime was not very large. b1q45ned9aie.png

    In "Sexual Peak: Socially Shared Cognitions About Desire, Frequency, and Satisfaction in Men and Women", the authors note a number of social factors that contribute to the belief that there are differences in sexual peak for each sex, such as men being most materially desirable later in life when they are further in their careers, men & women being more experienced sexually at later ages which leads to more orgasms for female partners, and the possibility for increased desire to actually be a way of responding to decreased fertility.

    9r8yeea4eumv.png

    In "Gender Differences in Sexuality: Perceptions, Myths, and Realities", Wiederman points out that a lot of the data earlier work was based on did not reflect reality. Many of the undergrads surveyed actually held distorted beliefs about how much the opposite sex desired sex, which indicates that the underlying assumptions of women wanting less sex and men wanting more sex during college are not accurate.

    Lastly, because no analysis of an issue is ever complete without some criticism of capitalism, there are entire markets springing up to profit from this belief. In The "'Cougar' Phenomenon: An Examination of the Factors That Influence Age-Hypogamous Sexual Relationships Among Middle-Aged Women", Carmichael and Alarie discuss the products and services that are marketed to older women in their analysis of the cougar phenomenon, which range from cruises to dating services and even sex toys. It is no secret that sexual expression is socially constructed: from hippy culture to Victorian culture, we can easily see the way that this manifests itself in human history domestically and internationally. The existence of this myth better enables corporations to sell things to women who are willing to buy into it, and the existence of these things functions as a social proof that it's accurate. Each bolsters the other, but neither one actually proves the other correct, and a bunch of fat cats get to separate you from your hard earned dollars exploiting that.
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile

    You told me to take responsibility.

    And you researched what?

    I get you can't back up your argument.

    It's very easy to back up.
    In "Is there an early-30s peak in female sexual desire? Cross-sectional evidence from the United States and Canada", the authors found that men in one sample experienced a sexual peak that conflicts with what you said to OP. Moreover, the support they found that bolsters the old Kinsey view for a later female sexual prime was not very large. b1q45ned9aie.png

    In "Sexual Peak: Socially Shared Cognitions About Desire, Frequency, and Satisfaction in Men and Women", the authors note a number of social factors that contribute to the belief that there are differences in sexual peak for each sex, such as men being most materially desirable later in life when they are further in their careers, men & women being more experienced sexually at later ages which leads to more orgasms for female partners, and the possibility for increased desire to actually be a way of responding to decreased fertility.

    9r8yeea4eumv.png

    In "Gender Differences in Sexuality: Perceptions, Myths, and Realities", Wiederman points out that a lot of the data earlier work was based on did not reflect reality. Many of the undergrads surveyed actually held distorted beliefs about how much the opposite sex desired sex, which indicates that the underlying assumptions of women wanting less sex and men wanting more sex during college are not accurate.

    Lastly, because no analysis of an issue is ever complete without some criticism of capitalism, there are entire markets springing up to profit from this belief. In The "'Cougar' Phenomenon: An Examination of the Factors That Influence Age-Hypogamous Sexual Relationships Among Middle-Aged Women", Carmichael and Alarie discuss the products and services that are marketed to older women in their analysis of the cougar phenomenon, which range from cruises to dating services and even sex toys. It is no secret that sexual expression is socially constructed: from hippy culture to Victorian culture, we can easily see the way that this manifests itself in human history domestically and internationally. The existence of this myth better enables corporations to sell things to women who are willing to buy into it, and the existence of these things functions as a social proof that it's accurate. Each bolsters the other, but neither one actually proves the other correct, and a bunch of fat cats get to separate you from your hard earned dollars exploiting that.

    that's not biological evidence. survey questions and opinion.
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile

    You told me to take responsibility.

    And you researched what?

    I get you can't back up your argument.

    It's very easy to back up.
    In "Is there an early-30s peak in female sexual desire? Cross-sectional evidence from the United States and Canada", the authors found that men in one sample experienced a sexual peak that conflicts with what you said to OP. Moreover, the support they found that bolsters the old Kinsey view for a later female sexual prime was not very large. b1q45ned9aie.png

    In "Sexual Peak: Socially Shared Cognitions About Desire, Frequency, and Satisfaction in Men and Women", the authors note a number of social factors that contribute to the belief that there are differences in sexual peak for each sex, such as men being most materially desirable later in life when they are further in their careers, men & women being more experienced sexually at later ages which leads to more orgasms for female partners, and the possibility for increased desire to actually be a way of responding to decreased fertility.

    9r8yeea4eumv.png

    In "Gender Differences in Sexuality: Perceptions, Myths, and Realities", Wiederman points out that a lot of the data earlier work was based on did not reflect reality. Many of the undergrads surveyed actually held distorted beliefs about how much the opposite sex desired sex, which indicates that the underlying assumptions of women wanting less sex and men wanting more sex during college are not accurate.

    Lastly, because no analysis of an issue is ever complete without some criticism of capitalism, there are entire markets springing up to profit from this belief. In The "'Cougar' Phenomenon: An Examination of the Factors That Influence Age-Hypogamous Sexual Relationships Among Middle-Aged Women", Carmichael and Alarie discuss the products and services that are marketed to older women in their analysis of the cougar phenomenon, which range from cruises to dating services and even sex toys. It is no secret that sexual expression is socially constructed: from hippy culture to Victorian culture, we can easily see the way that this manifests itself in human history domestically and internationally. The existence of this myth better enables corporations to sell things to women who are willing to buy into it, and the existence of these things functions as a social proof that it's accurate. Each bolsters the other, but neither one actually proves the other correct, and a bunch of fat cats get to separate you from your hard earned dollars exploiting that.

    that's not biological evidence. survey questions and opinion.

    I'm not arguing for a biological explanation. A biological explanation is not well supported by the literature and there is a lot of conflicting data, like the case of Japan. The view of women hitting their sexual prime in their thirties is mythologized, which I have supported, and you have failed to give any support for.

    Don't prove Boss right
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    I wouldn't hold your breath. I already showed the flaws in your comment. If you want to show me where i'm wrong I'm all ears, but I've read a decent amount on the topic to know that what you implied has not been en vogue for awhile

    You told me to take responsibility.

    And you researched what?

    I get you can't back up your argument.

    It's very easy to back up.
    In "Is there an early-30s peak in female sexual desire? Cross-sectional evidence from the United States and Canada", the authors found that men in one sample experienced a sexual peak that conflicts with what you said to OP. Moreover, the support they found that bolsters the old Kinsey view for a later female sexual prime was not very large. b1q45ned9aie.png

    In "Sexual Peak: Socially Shared Cognitions About Desire, Frequency, and Satisfaction in Men and Women", the authors note a number of social factors that contribute to the belief that there are differences in sexual peak for each sex, such as men being most materially desirable later in life when they are further in their careers, men & women being more experienced sexually at later ages which leads to more orgasms for female partners, and the possibility for increased desire to actually be a way of responding to decreased fertility.

    9r8yeea4eumv.png

    In "Gender Differences in Sexuality: Perceptions, Myths, and Realities", Wiederman points out that a lot of the data earlier work was based on did not reflect reality. Many of the undergrads surveyed actually held distorted beliefs about how much the opposite sex desired sex, which indicates that the underlying assumptions of women wanting less sex and men wanting more sex during college are not accurate.

    Lastly, because no analysis of an issue is ever complete without some criticism of capitalism, there are entire markets springing up to profit from this belief. In The "'Cougar' Phenomenon: An Examination of the Factors That Influence Age-Hypogamous Sexual Relationships Among Middle-Aged Women", Carmichael and Alarie discuss the products and services that are marketed to older women in their analysis of the cougar phenomenon, which range from cruises to dating services and even sex toys. It is no secret that sexual expression is socially constructed: from hippy culture to Victorian culture, we can easily see the way that this manifests itself in human history domestically and internationally. The existence of this myth better enables corporations to sell things to women who are willing to buy into it, and the existence of these things functions as a social proof that it's accurate. Each bolsters the other, but neither one actually proves the other correct, and a bunch of fat cats get to separate you from your hard earned dollars exploiting that.

    that's not biological evidence. survey questions and opinion.

    I'm not arguing for a biological explanation. A biological explanation is not well supported by the literature and there is a lot of conflicting data, like the case of Japan. The view of women hitting their sexual prime in their thirties is mythologized, which I have supported, and you have failed to give any support for.

    Don't prove Boss right

    I made a statement, you disagree, it's not up to me to support it. You can google, as can i. You stated it's a MYTH, which would mean it has been proved to be false. It has not. People have differing opinions. What am I supposed to give support to? What I KNOW to be true for me and other women I know? You don't believe that since you know my ? in your mind.

    Idgaf about proving ? , you ? can kiss my entire ass. Y'all worship him, I don't. So you can save the condescending ? , thanks.
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited July 2017
    Your opinion is only as good as the evidence showing that it's realistic. You've given none other than what you feel. Which tells us nothing about anyone but you, let alone OP's gf.

    Don't call me the n word i thought we were friends
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Your opinion is only as good as the evidence showing that it's realistic. You've given none other than what you feel. Which tells us nothing about anyone but you, let alone OP's gf.

    Don't call me the n word i thought we were friends

    When's the last time you told your ? he gives you too much ? ? Never?

    Oh ok, I think I'm a tad more qualified to help op get some insight on a problem a WOMAN is having than you. Feelings or not.
  • Madame_CJSkywalker
    Madame_CJSkywalker Members Posts: 940 ✭✭✭✭
    edited July 2017
    I'm late

    but as others have said her diet, hormones, stress, etc could be to blame for her waning sex drive

    and she could also honestly feel as though you could take a greater interest in her mental opposed to her sex

    these aren't mutually exclusive ideas

    and this may not be the case with you, but from my observation for many men physical affection/sex is only way they know how to show love for their girl. and view sex with someone they care as an act of love and thus are likely to initiate sex the more they love their partners. or either they have a hard time expressing their emotions, fears, aspirations, etc verbally so they substitute sex for real intimacy leaving their girl feeling unfulfilled which can obviously lead to problems

    that said, give her time and try to do your part to try to make her feel as though you want her not just for want she can give you....and hit the gym

    and if she is really into you she will try to make the necessary lifestyle changes if this continues to be a problem

    or least make the effort to see if the issue is health related

    yall young though so she may not be in the position or willing to make the sacrifices do these things

    so don't lose sight of what makes you happy just to keep her

    hope t/s everything works out for you though


  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Your opinion is only as good as the evidence showing that it's realistic. You've given none other than what you feel. Which tells us nothing about anyone but you, let alone OP's gf.

    Don't call me the n word i thought we were friends

    When's the last time you told your ? he gives you too much ? ? Never?

    Oh ok, I think I'm a tad more qualified to help op get some insight on a problem a WOMAN is having than you. Feelings or not.

    I don't own a black man. What do I look like, John McCain?

    You are not more qualified than a sociology professor to talk about the social construction of sexual primacy as mythology in Western society, though.

    http://www.salon.com/2013/08/14/5_reasons_your_sexual_peak_might_be_fake/
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited July 2017
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Westie wrote: »
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Your opinion is only as good as the evidence showing that it's realistic. You've given none other than what you feel. Which tells us nothing about anyone but you, let alone OP's gf.

    Don't call me the n word i thought we were friends

    When's the last time you told your ? he gives you too much ? ? Never?

    Oh ok, I think I'm a tad more qualified to help op get some insight on a problem a WOMAN is having than you. Feelings or not.

    I don't own a black man. What do I look like, John McCain?

    You are not more qualified than a sociology professor to talk about the social construction of sexual primacy as mythology in Western society, though.

    http://www.salon.com/2013/08/14/5_reasons_your_sexual_peak_might_be_fake/

    Him and his girlfriend peaking at different times was 1 part of a comment. Find something else to harp on.


    Also, key word *MIGHT*
  • LUClEN
    LUClEN Members Posts: 20,559 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Not until you admit that you learned something new today
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
    LUClEN wrote: »
    Not until you admit that you learned something new today

    I learned I don't like you very much. Does that suffice?