I'm not a poet or nothing but I wrote this a month ago thought I'd see what you think
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Esiam
Banned Users Posts: 1,533 ✭✭
Anyways here's my poem I wrote, I'm not a poet or anything I just sometimes I write poems to deal with ? and I usually don't go back and change stuff so sometimes they are kind of "fluid" or whatever, I never read poetry or anything, my influences would prolly be the movie SLAM and well rapmusic in general...
Now starts the bleeding, even though my heart is beating
I'm at large with defeat when, I start to to pull apart these thoughts I've been keeping
In my thinking-capsule, why must the glass always be half-empty never half-full
I can't take the hassle, I can't even break the castle of sand that you helped build
I await then I fast forward, re-wind the tape run it back play nah pause hit record
Now starts the bleeding, even though my heart is beating
I feel like I'm caught in a beating severly bruised and battered
But in the end does what I feel really matter
So what? I'm caught up in this mental battery, beating myself to death
Defeating myself to my very last breath, deleting myself to my very last step
One step closer to ? , two steps away from you
Three steps away from knowing what to do in the fourth quarter
I'm cornered, surrounded, trapped between a rock and a hard place
This is not filet mignon, this is sushi I'm giving you the raw taste
No CGI-effects could ressurect my damaged intellect
But in retrospect maybe I could have spoken another dialect if I got my head checked
Nah my heart would most likely be just like me but slightly different
I might be indifferent, because I don't think I care anymore if I did that would make a slight difference
but I don't so whatever next flight leaves at 5 AM one-way ticket no return to innocence
For even though my heart is beating the bleeding has already started I won't be coming back home
For my soul has slowly started to depart from where my heart is destination unknown
Now starts the bleeding, even though my heart is beating
I'm at large with defeat when, I start to to pull apart these thoughts I've been keeping
In my thinking-capsule, why must the glass always be half-empty never half-full
I can't take the hassle, I can't even break the castle of sand that you helped build
I await then I fast forward, re-wind the tape run it back play nah pause hit record
Now starts the bleeding, even though my heart is beating
I feel like I'm caught in a beating severly bruised and battered
But in the end does what I feel really matter
So what? I'm caught up in this mental battery, beating myself to death
Defeating myself to my very last breath, deleting myself to my very last step
One step closer to ? , two steps away from you
Three steps away from knowing what to do in the fourth quarter
I'm cornered, surrounded, trapped between a rock and a hard place
This is not filet mignon, this is sushi I'm giving you the raw taste
No CGI-effects could ressurect my damaged intellect
But in retrospect maybe I could have spoken another dialect if I got my head checked
Nah my heart would most likely be just like me but slightly different
I might be indifferent, because I don't think I care anymore if I did that would make a slight difference
but I don't so whatever next flight leaves at 5 AM one-way ticket no return to innocence
For even though my heart is beating the bleeding has already started I won't be coming back home
For my soul has slowly started to depart from where my heart is destination unknown
Comments
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Good ? fam, I write anytime to deal with my issues too. This ? is a great way to relase stress .
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Thanks man
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this was a decent drop, for somebody who don't write much, or consider themself a poet.. I honestly believe everybody has a poet in them.. just gotta implement all the tools..
But i enjoyed reading this, and i hope to see you grow poetically right chere'!!!
keep em' coming!
thanks for sharing too,
Peace! -
Alright thanks tbh I'm not sure if I can grow poetically, I mean I don't see it as a problem, I don't plan on becoming a poet or nothing it's just venting really for me, like when I write I just write, like the ? just write themselves I start with something and then I end somewhere, sometimes I try to wrap it all together by reusing portions from one line in the other like usually the first returns somehow in the last, to make it sort of a neverending circle, other than that I don't think much when I write
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you are really talented. I like it
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Alright thanks tbh I'm not sure if I can grow poetically, I mean I don't see it as a problem, I don't plan on becoming a poet or nothing it's just venting really for me, like when I write I just write, like the ? just write themselves I start with something and then I end somewhere, sometimes I try to wrap it all together by reusing portions from one line in the other like usually the first returns somehow in the last, to make it sort of a neverending circle, other than that I don't think much when I write
your most welcome.. and that's okay. you can share your writing here with us if you like.. if that's what you can do to vent, go on ahead lol.. most of us usually turn to something to vent out frustrations and anger or emotions for that matter..and writing is thee best outlet...
Peace. -
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One step closer to ? , two steps away from you
Three steps away from knowing what to do in the fourth quarter
That's my favorite part right there. Really clever, easy to connect with, at least for me.
