Why'd I Smash? :( (ill Community True Life Tales)
Options
Comments
-
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan
I was living with my ? in Kennesaw at the time, and this ? was always hyping me about this spot called Electric Cowboy. He said it was this giant two story cowboy club filled with white ? who who thirsty for ? since none ever came in. Him and his boy used to clean up there every weekend, so one weekend when I wasn't working I was like, 'Aiight bet lets slide out'
So we get in this ? and I kid you not, its like thousands of ? in there yeehawing, square dancing, electric sliding, and cha-cha'ing and ? . White women as far as the eye can see. We walked in there (3 ? ) and it was like we had halos or a glowing aura or some ? . My boy and his friend are these light skinned green eyed ? so the top tier ? were fighting over them. With that said, ALL THE HOOD RAT WHITE ? FLOCK TO ME, I'm like ? !!
Anyway this was when I was in my 'broke & scheming' days and I just wanted to smoke and smash with these hoes. I went down the hoodrat line up like it was an interview.
"You got weed at home? Oh you don't?"
"You got weed at home? Oh you do??"
Notice how my only criteria was, "weed" and nothing about how you look. The only ? who said she had, "pounds of kush" was this 350+ pound chick with her 'sister' who was around 250+ pounds. ? looked like Honey Boo Boo's moms on a good day. Both these ? came to the joint in Jetta. I rode with them and sat on the sisters lap in the back seat. I should've stopped the car and got out right there.
We get to this ? crib and it was falling apart, holes in the roof, pots on the floor, holes in the ground, 6 pitbulls, 1 snake, and all these mu'fuckas are roaming around free. ? damn zoo. At this point I don't even wanna smash anymore I just want to rob this ? for all her stash, I was so upset at myself. She went to the fridge and pulled out wild turkey and we get to taking shots. I'm blurry at this point, she get naked and motions for me to come over to her. I tried as hard as I could to get hard, it just wasn't working. My ? was like, "? , I'll never forgive you for this ? ". Anyway after a hour or so I got like half a hard on and busted a pathetic nut on this ? back, she started to tell me how she's a freelance ? or sometihng along the lines. She passes out after we drink more wild turkey and I found this ? stash and took about a OZ of kush and had my boy come pick me up.
I didn't share that OZ with anyone. I earned that lick.
Yo the bolded got me ? up!
-
Man. Here goes:
I got back to the States after a 3 year high school education in the great Nigeria (NAIJA STAND UP!!).
It was college and I wasn't quite adjusted to the social pace of America. I was a bit rusty after being away for 3 years. I wasn't a foreigner but socially I wasn't as sharp as I used to be.
Well, it's college and it seems like everybody just knew how to get play. Make matters worse, I used to frequent Howard U for parties with my good friend. Well, one night he invites me out to a party and I'm grindin with this one girl. We get pretty hot and heavy and she advises to go back to her place. Sure thing.
Mind you, I'm like 19 and still very impressionable. She looked a bit older for a college student (maybe 2-3 years older) but she was really short and petite. Like 5'0 flat, so I went with it.
So we get back to her place, which is some ways off North Capitol and proceed to get busy.
I start taking off my clothes and head to her bed. She stops me and says she has her 'drugs' there. I'm like ok thats cool, just move them. I asked what drugs and she said 'don't worry, you don't do that kind of stuff'.
OK.... I pry a little more and then she lifts up a ? pipe and a small rock.
WTF!!! She smokes it in my front and just gets super hyped up. Like I said, I was quite ? whipped at that time so I still went along with it. I passed on the head and went straight to doggy. Strapped up and destroyed the ? .
Was lowkey scared I could catch the ? second hand smoke.
Never again.
this ? smashed a college crackhead lololol -
Man. Here goes:
I got back to the States after a 3 year high school education in the great Nigeria (NAIJA STAND UP!!).
It was college and I wasn't quite adjusted to the social pace of America. I was a bit rusty after being away for 3 years. I wasn't a foreigner but socially I wasn't as sharp as I used to be.
Well, it's college and it seems like everybody just knew how to get play. Make matters worse, I used to frequent Howard U for parties with my good friend. Well, one night he invites me out to a party and I'm grindin with this one girl. We get pretty hot and heavy and she advises to go back to her place. Sure thing.
Mind you, I'm like 19 and still very impressionable. She looked a bit older for a college student (maybe 2-3 years older) but she was really short and petite. Like 5'0 flat, so I went with it.
So we get back to her place, which is some ways off North Capitol and proceed to get busy.
I start taking off my clothes and head to her bed. She stops me and says she has her 'drugs' there. I'm like ok thats cool, just move them. I asked what drugs and she said 'don't worry, you don't do that kind of stuff'.
OK.... I pry a little more and then she lifts up a ? pipe and a small rock.
WTF!!! She smokes it in my front and just gets super hyped up. Like I said, I was quite ? whipped at that time so I still went along with it. I passed on the head and went straight to doggy. Strapped up and destroyed the ? .
Was lowkey scared I could catch the ? second hand smoke.
Never again.
this ? smashed a college crackhead lololol
I will say I got a full test in January. A-OK. Never again shall I succumb to such lows. -
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan
I was living with my ? in Kennesaw at the time, and this ? was always hyping me about this spot called Electric Cowboy. He said it was this giant two story cowboy club filled with white ? who who thirsty for ? since none ever came in. Him and his boy used to clean up there every weekend, so one weekend when I wasn't working I was like, 'Aiight bet lets slide out'
So we get in this ? and I kid you not, its like thousands of ? in there yeehawing, square dancing, electric sliding, and cha-cha'ing and ? . White women as far as the eye can see. We walked in there (3 ? ) and it was like we had halos or a glowing aura or some ? . My boy and his friend are these light skinned green eyed ? so the top tier ? were fighting over them. With that said, ALL THE HOOD RAT WHITE ? FLOCK TO ME, I'm like ? !!
Anyway this was when I was in my 'broke & scheming' days and I just wanted to smoke and smash with these hoes. I went down the hoodrat line up like it was an interview.
"You got weed at home? Oh you don't?"
"You got weed at home? Oh you do??"
Notice how my only criteria was, "weed" and nothing about how you look. The only ? who said she had, "pounds of kush" was this 350+ pound chick with her 'sister' who was around 250+ pounds. ? looked like Honey Boo Boo's moms on a good day. Both these ? came to the joint in Jetta. I rode with them and sat on the sisters lap in the back seat. I should've stopped the car and got out right there.
We get to this ? crib and it was falling apart, holes in the roof, pots on the floor, holes in the ground, 6 pitbulls, 1 snake, and all these mu'fuckas are roaming around free. ? damn zoo. At this point I don't even wanna smash anymore I just want to rob this ? for all her stash, I was so upset at myself. She went to the fridge and pulled out wild turkey and we get to taking shots. I'm blurry at this point, she get naked and motions for me to come over to her. I tried as hard as I could to get hard, it just wasn't working. My ? was like, "? , I'll never forgive you for this ? ". Anyway after a hour or so I got like half a hard on and busted a pathetic nut on this ? back, she started to tell me how she's a freelance ? or sometihng along the lines. She passes out after we drink more wild turkey and I found this ? stash and took about a OZ of kush and had my boy come pick me up.
I didn't share that OZ with anyone. I earned that lick.
bruh i had to leave my office laughing at the bolded.. smh
-
im in tears at sat in her lap lmao
-
Just the mental image alone of him sittin her lap is worth about 6 L's. Lol!
-
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan
I was living with my ? in Kennesaw at the time, and this ? was always hyping me about this spot called Electric Cowboy. He said it was this giant two story cowboy club filled with white ? who who thirsty for ? since none ever came in. Him and his boy used to clean up there every weekend, so one weekend when I wasn't working I was like, 'Aiight bet lets slide out'
So we get in this ? and I kid you not, its like thousands of ? in there yeehawing, square dancing, electric sliding, and cha-cha'ing and ? . White women as far as the eye can see. We walked in there (3 ? ) and it was like we had halos or a glowing aura or some ? . My boy and his friend are these light skinned green eyed ? so the top tier ? were fighting over them. With that said, ALL THE HOOD RAT WHITE ? FLOCK TO ME, I'm like ? !!
Anyway this was when I was in my 'broke & scheming' days and I just wanted to smoke and smash with these hoes. I went down the hoodrat line up like it was an interview.
"You got weed at home? Oh you don't?"
"You got weed at home? Oh you do??"
Notice how my only criteria was, "weed" and nothing about how you look. The only ? who said she had, "pounds of kush" was this 350+ pound chick with her 'sister' who was around 250+ pounds. ? looked like Honey Boo Boo's moms on a good day. Both these ? came to the joint in Jetta. I rode with them and sat on the sisters lap in the back seat. I should've stopped the car and got out right there.
We get to this ? crib and it was falling apart, holes in the roof, pots on the floor, holes in the ground, 6 pitbulls, 1 snake, and all these mu'fuckas are roaming around free. ? damn zoo. At this point I don't even wanna smash anymore I just want to rob this ? for all her stash, I was so upset at myself. She went to the fridge and pulled out wild turkey and we get to taking shots. I'm blurry at this point, she get naked and motions for me to come over to her. I tried as hard as I could to get hard, it just wasn't working. My ? was like, "? , I'll never forgive you for this ? ". Anyway after a hour or so I got like half a hard on and busted a pathetic nut on this ? back, she started to tell me how she's a freelance ? or sometihng along the lines. She passes out after we drink more wild turkey and I found this ? stash and took about a OZ of kush and had my boy come pick me up.
I didn't share that OZ with anyone. I earned that lick.
bruh i had to leave my office laughing at the bolded.. smh
woooooo....Im in the office trying hard as ? to control my laughing...the bold killed me -
That ? funny as ? make a movie
