Dating a fighter..turn on or turn off?

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Dupac
Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited May 2010 in The Powder Room
I'm not talking about any place, any time on some super tough thug ? ....

I'm just talking someone who has a strong confrontational personality and is very willing to go to blows when the situation calls for it..

I ask because I know a lotta ppl are really passive these days, and would prefer to talk things out, or just let ? slide..

but i have my feelings that no matter how much ladies may mature, there's still something that turns yall on when yall gotta man who is willing to get ? to prove his point...
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  • Nthngis4vr
    Nthngis4vr Members Posts: 2,171 ✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    It's a turn-off for me. It's one thing to stand up for yourself as a man. That's sexy.

    But if I have to worry about something ? him off and it turns into a physical fight, it would make me not want to go with him anywhere.
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    nthngis4vr& alwyzisalie wrote: »
    It's a turn-off for me. It's one thing to stand up for yourself as a man. That's sexy.

    But if I have to worry about something ? him off and it turns into a physical fight, it would make me not want to go with him anywhere.

    i still think there's something primal in all of yall that still gets turned on by a man expressing himself physically through confrontation
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  • Bwoahmizzee
    Bwoahmizzee Members Posts: 6,962 ✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    everything I do is justifyable (sp?)

    I'm just sayin tho

    continue on
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  • Nthngis4vr
    Nthngis4vr Members Posts: 2,171 ✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    dusouljah wrote: »
    i still think there's something primal in all of yall that still gets turned on by a man expressing himself physically through confrontation

    eh...I like MMA & boxing but if we're out and some funk pops off, I'd be more turned on if he can keep his cool and calm the situation without being physical.
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    nthngis4vr& alwyzisalie wrote: »
    eh...I like MMA & boxing but if we're out and some funk pops off, I'd be more turned on if he can keep his cool and calm the situation without being physical.

    i mean, if he's legtimately upset, to the point where he exchanges some words, but keeps his cool outta respect and maturity, that's one thing...that's understandable...u can still project the threat of an confrontation witout having to really act on it.. it's just the way u say things and carry urself...

    u know the difference between someone trying to keep their cool vs someone who's not trying to see no parts of any beef...


    i'm talking about a complete mouse...like dude seemed shooked, and was trying his absolute best to talk his way out of any altercation....and that was a constant thing... like dude wanted absolutely no parts of beef with another man...

    with you he may play a front like he's aggressive, or shows confidence in himself...... but with other men, dude is just flat out timid...

    u notice as time goes on, amongst other men..dude really is super soft, no thougness at all, like u know for a fact if a dude bucked at him, you, or anyone else.. there's no chance that he mans up in the situation...

    you'd look at him and love him the same regaurdless??
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    i mean i think women find a certain comfort in a man that she knows will fight and protect her if needed be....

    it may seem extreme, but i see a lotta women who have these dudes who they think is a good protector, but they really are mice.. but i don't think they've (the women) realized it yet..and when they do i think it's going to change the way they look at them dramatically
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  • Nthngis4vr
    Nthngis4vr Members Posts: 2,171 ✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    dusouljah wrote: »
    i mean, if he's legtimately upset, to the point where he exchanges some words, but keeps his cool outta respect and maturity, that's one thing...that's understandable...u can still project the threat of an confrontation witout having to really act on it.. it's just the way u say things and carry urself...

    u know the difference between someone trying to keep their cool vs someone who's not trying to see no parts of any beef...


    i'm talking about a complete mouse...like dude seemed shooked, and was trying his absolute best to talk his way out of any altercation....and that was a constant thing... like dude wanted absolutely no parts of beef with another man...

    with you he may play a front like he's aggressive, or shows confidence in himself...... but with other men, dude is just flat out timid...

    u notice as time goes on, amongst other men..dude really is super soft, no thougness at all, like u know for a fact if a dude bucked at him, you, or anyone else.. there's no chance that he mans up in the situation...

    you'd look at him and love him the same regaurdless??

    oh okay... then I'd go with the fighter. If he's scared to stand up for himself or me, he'd lose my respect. fast.
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  • marie addams
    marie addams Members Posts: 1,699 ✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    a turn off
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  • makaveli03
    makaveli03 Members Posts: 2,392
    edited May 2010
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    the ? i look like going to jail for some ? ? that dont affect my life in anyway?....fighting to attract a woman is the dumbest ? i've ever heard..who gives a ? what a woman think bout you?
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    makaveli03 wrote: »
    the ? i look like going to jail for some ? ? that dont affect my life in anyway?....fighting to attract a woman is the dumbest ? i've ever heard..who gives a ? what a woman think bout you?

    i think u missed every possible point to this thread
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    marie addams wrote: »
    a turn off
    and again, i'm not speaking in the sense of someone who's contatnyl always flying off the handle at every given moment...

    i'm just speaking of a man who has that aggresiveness to his personality where you can consider him a fighter....if a situation arises where he has to fight he would be willing to do so...

    the reason i ask, is because i've een a lotta men who just don't have that characteristic in them at all..they just aren't fighters...it's virtually impossible to envoke anything in them to drive them to that point..

    they're just timid at heart....

    and i'm just curious can a woman knowing this...knowing that there's absolutely no chance of her man ever being the type of dude that would get into a fight over anything...stil find a man like that attractive....
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  • makaveli03
    makaveli03 Members Posts: 2,392
    edited May 2010
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    dusouljah wrote: »
    and again, i'm not speaking in the sense of someone who's contatnyl always flying off the handle at every given moment...

    i'm just speaking of a man who has that aggresiveness to his personality where you can consider him a fighter....if a situation arises where he has to fight he would be willing to do so...

    the reason i ask, is because i've een a lotta men who just don't have that characteristic in them at all..they just aren't fighters...it's virtually impossible to envoke anything in them to drive them to that point..

    they're just timid at heart....

    and i'm just curious can a woman knowing this...knowing that there's absolutely no chance of her man ever being the type of dude that would get into a fight over anything...stil find a man like that attractive....

    but you dont know if that dude "Wont get into a fight over anything"....a woman should not use that characteristic as a way to "see if hes worthy of her".....If shaq never wanted to get into a fight...would a woman turn him down because she thought she wouldn't feel safe with him?....would that even make sense?....Just because a dude doesnt overreact over everything...doesnt mean he cant defend himself...some people really just dont see the point in wasting energy over people who dont affect they're lives in any way shape or form...the only way anyone is going to fight is if literally the person is attacked to the point where HE HAS to defend himself...or his girl....besides that, any situation where its just immaturity controlling that individual's thought process and causes the dude to allow himself to throw down when he really aint have to shouldn't be "cool points" to a woman....IMO theres nothing attractive to a woman who has a bf in jail when he didnt have to fight
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    makaveli03 wrote: »
    but you dont know if that dude "Wont get into a fight over anything"....a woman should not use that characteristic as a way to "see if hes worthy of her".....If shaq never wanted to get into a fight...would a woman turn him down because she thought she wouldn't feel safe with him?....would that even make sense?....Just because a dude doesnt overreact over everything...doesnt mean he cant defend himself...some people really just dont see the point in wasting energy over people who dont affect they're lives in any way shape or form...the only way anyone is going to fight is if literally the person is attacked to the point where HE HAS to defend himself...or his girl....besides that, any situation where its just immaturity controlling that individual's thought process and causes the dude to allow himself to throw down when he really aint have to shouldn't be "cool points" to a woman....IMO theres nothing attractive to a woman who has a bf in jail when he didnt have to fight

    lol, dawg, i'm not talking about fighting over a woman...

    that's not what this is about at all....

    i'm talking about the person himself...if the guy is a fighter or not, if he has that aggresiveness to his personality,

    he doesn't even have to be around his woman if and when he gets into anything...

    i'm talking about the kind of man that absolutely will NOT defend himself, outside of curling up in a little ball if someone choses to become physical with them first...

    there are a lotta men out here who just have passive natures all together, they'd rather either try to talk themselves out of any confrontations with other men, or just stay silent until the situation is over....


    it doesn't matter if they're in front of their lady or not, that's just who they are....they're timid, non-confrontational..not the type to ever get physical...

    i'm not talking the quiet type who lets things slide till they reach their breaking point.........i'm talking about the type of dude who has no real backbone at all...

    i'm asking women if they knew their man to be this kind of person, could they look past that.. or does that toughness, and aggresiveness, willingness to stand up for himsef and be confrontational have to be a part of their personality...

    i know a lotta women who don't want anything to do with rowdy, rah rah thug types, i understand that completely,...no one wants a ? that's a danger to himself and everyone around him...

    but i'm asking could they want a guy who's a timid mouse??
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  • akforty7
    akforty7 Members Posts: 3,654 ✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    i feel sorry for du's keyboard... that muhfucka take a beating every day

    it's a turn off
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    akforty7 wrote: »
    i feel sorry for du's keyboard... that muhfucka take a beating every day

    it's a turn off

    lmao....silly
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  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] rubbed off from friction Posts: 0 ✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    The user and all related content has been deleted.
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  • betterthenu84
    betterthenu84 Members Posts: 861 ✭
    edited May 2010
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    nthngis4vr& alwyzisalie wrote: »
    It's a turn-off for me. It's one thing to stand up for yourself as a man. That's sexy.

    But if I have to worry about something ? him off and it turns into a physical fight, it would make me not want to go with him anywhere.

    This is pretty much how I feel.
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  • Iheart~Cali
    Iheart~Cali Members Posts: 5,991 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    Hmmm I don't mind it so long as he uses discretion. ALOT of discretion.
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  • junegemini
    junegemini Members Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    naw, fighting is only cool when its necessary and in most situations, its not
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    either i'm completey wrong about women or yall are all misunderstanding what i'm asking..

    basically i'm asking can you still respect and be attracted to a non-confrontational & passive man...

    i've seen many women pretty much beast on a dude who they know just doesn't have any aggressivenees about their personality...

    i'm not talking about a hot head who can't function with regular people,...i understand how that can be a turn off...

    im talking about a punk..someone who doesn't demand or command respect from their peers, theyre just completely passive and have absolutely no fight in them at all....


    i was always under the asumption that women respected dtrength in a man....yall liked the "alpha male"

    but i guess i was wrong...
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  • junegemini
    junegemini Members Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    naw, i need him to be aggressive

    june loves aggressiveness
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  • Blue Virgo
    Blue Virgo Members Posts: 7,092 ✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    I need that aggressiveness and willingness to stand up for yourself/me.

    I can't have my man be a punk.
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    junegemini wrote: »
    naw, i need him to be aggressive

    june loves aggressiveness

    right, cuz i knew this dude, who would constantly pull chicks, but constantly lose them, and for the longest i had no idea why... then i realized that EVERYBODY carried this dude all the time,

    his sisters, his roomates, his brothers, his friends.. and dude was just as passive and dismissive as possible...

    and i tried to help dude, told him he needa stand up for himself..

    and he was always like

    "yo i'm just ot a fighter"

    i saw him the other day on face book, hugged up with a chck..shorty was bad too, i just hope he learned how to man up....i was explaing this to someone one day, and they was like

    "not every female wants a fighter"

    but i was like
    "u don't have to be a complete ? , but u can't be a mouse either..i can't see a woman respecting a compeltely passive man"

    so it was just a debate i thought i'd ask yall....

    i'm defintely suprised though...cuz a lot of yall seem to be the types to baby a dude like that too,

    like if he gets punked or disrespected all the time all would make excuses and just say, "baby it's okay" or something like that
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  • Bwoahmizzee
    Bwoahmizzee Members Posts: 6,962 ✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    not every female want's a fighter

    but no real female wants a sucka ass ?
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2010
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    Bwoahmizzee wrote: »
    not every female want's a fighter

    but no real female wants a sucka ass ?

    that's exactly what i thought, but i might be wrong...
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