Today on the Tyra Show... Abortions And The Women Who Get Them
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Tyra Banks
Members Posts: 14
"Our guest today has been here before. I'm sure everyone remembers her from an earlier show where we had the twin psychic sisters tell her if her boyfriend was cheating on her... unfortunately he was".
Please welcome back... Aquina Phillips *round of applause*
Tyra: "Now Aquina, I want to get right into the nitty gritty. How many abortions have you had?"
Aquina: "I've had 3, maybe 4 abortions Tyra"
Tyra: "Why?"
Aquina: "Honestly Tyra, I found out the fathers didnt want to be with me after I became pregnant so I felt the best thing for me was to have the abortions"
Tyra: "So maybe we should have you back on a future show for women who cant keep a man?"
Aquina: *blank stare*
Tyra: "Well we have Sylvia Browne here today and she is going to cross over to the other side to try to get in touch with the fetuses that you aborted... Slyvia, come on out"
*round of applause*
Sylvia: "Hi Tyra, Hi Aquina" *sits next to Aquina and quickly jumps out of her chair*
Tyra: "Whats wrong Sylvia!"
Sylvia: "This woman has a metal coat hanger in her jacket pocket. Please tell her to get rid of it. I know I'm not a fetus but I'm not ready to die yet"
Aquina: *embarrased* "Sorry Tyra, I carry it with me where ever I go... Never know when a pregnancy is going to jump off"
*sylvia sits down and begins trying to reach dead fetuses*
Sylvia: "Fetus # 1 says "How was your birthday mommy? You dont have to answer that... I just wanna know why you killed me?" Your baby is here Aquina, go ahead and answer"
Aquina: "Baby please forgive me, I need a man in my life and your father didnt want to stick around, so I no longer had a need for you"
Slyvia: "Fetus # 2 says "I'm glad you aborted me mommy... My new home is similar to your ? except I can see through the jar glass and watch tv and whatnot. Plus Jesus spoke to me and is going to reincarnate me as a giant boot so I can come back and stomp the life outta you... BABY KILLER!!!". Fetus # 2 is awaiting respinse Aquina".
Aquina: *drops head in hands and cries* "I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry" *drops to knees and says prayer* "Jesus please do not allow me to die by boot... Amen"
Sylvia: "Fetus # 3 says "If you had marketed yourself the way the clinic marketed abortions, you would have sold more records than the amount of abortions you had. I will be visiting my baby sister AnnMarieflo in her dreams to warn her of the impending danger that lies within your coat hanger. If you want to die, I can show you how to do it". Fetus # 3 awaits your response Aquina"
Aquina: *runs off stage crying*
Tyra: "Oh my ? ... Whats her problem? Anyway... Next week on the Tyra Show we will be talking to women and the men they are incapable of keeping"
*round of applause*
Comments
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LOL!!!!!!!
I really felt like I was watching the Tyra show too. -
Lmao i died jrom seeing the first two picks.. Sylvia and.. Newyork
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this is just premeditated ether at it's finest
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gawdddddddddddddddd damn
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* deader than a aborted fetus*
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hahahahahhaha. that was well funny
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y'all ? wildin lol
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this is just premeditated ether at it's finest
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I'm in tears over here b!!! All I can say is...
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Abortion doctor wrote: »Excuse Tyra, me I need to speak with a Ms.
Aquafina Phillips?
We have some things to discuss about her payment method. Turns out food stamps are a no go with our accounting department. -
Abortion doctor wrote: »Excuse Tyra, me I need to speak with a Ms.
Aquafina Phillips?
We have some things to discuss about her payment method. Turns out food stamps are a no go with our accounting department.
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!
? .... -
I heard about this Aquina broad, b. ? dont like fetuses... She'd gladly take her shoes off to jump on a trampoline but she leaves her shoes on to jump on a baby? Sick, b, sick. Like real talk, I'd power bomb that ? into a fetus jar so that they could face their killer. I asked Aquina how many babies it'll take to paint my house and this ? tells me it depends on how hard you throw them... what part of the game is that b?
FOH -
lol...funny ? ....oh I'm laugh at the blatant ass kissing going on bout all this now
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lmao @ the hanger in her pocket oh lawd....
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Im a victim.
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DEE-LICIOUS wrote: »lmao @ the hanger in her pocket oh lawd....
It was bad girl... We had to edit that part of the show out. When my security staff seen that hanger they bumrushed Aquina... funny thing is they were all dressed in costumes of fetuses. The terror in that poor girls eyes... just sad. -
Aborted Fetus #1 wrote: »Im a victim.
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Tyra Banks wrote: »It was bad girl... We had to edit that part of the show out. When my security staff seen that hanger they bumrushed Aquina... funny thing is they were all dressed in costumes of fetuses. The terror in that poor girls eyes... just sad.
this ? got my neck hurting -
L.m.a.o
Where's Grundy with a dead gif -
get off the IC and start making money. Seriously. This ? too funny to give away for free.
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Will Munny wrote: »get off the IC and start making money. Seriously. This ? too funny to give away for free.
i be thinking this sometimes too, lol, some of these dudes really have comedic talent -
i be thinking this sometimes too, lol, some of these dudes really have comedic talent
I made a thead a long time ago called the "Official stand up comedy thread" or something like that. ? was comedy and was an instant classic. Got FOF'd with the quickness :tu
This thread is comedy btw lol -
Will Munny wrote: »get off the IC and start making money. Seriously. This ? too funny to give away for free.
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lmao hahahaha this will never get old
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the logical next step is to send an email with a link to these threads to Tyra HERSELF. Get some exposure for real.
this has past guest...where are they now? written all over it.
http://twitter.com/tyrabanks
^^^one of the fetii should tweet an update with a link to this and tag tyra.