Poly-life or nah...
Options
Comments
-
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »HundredEyes wrote: »Ol girl fiending for the D out there lmao
Look...youre torn between whats good for you or your baby just says you aint really ? .
Oh I'm definitely not ? .
But we're past that part.
To be fair, he'll still have a dad/male role model.
I'm not fiending...I'm just trying to understand whyyyy I can't have a side ? . Like..it's just sex, bro.
Lmao @CapitalB you know what to do fam. -
Or maybe you need @DoUwant2go2Heaven in your life girl.
-
AggieLean. wrote: »So, the relationship you have with your current dude is pretty much dead, as it seems you’ve moved on mentally, just not physically yet. You haven’t made your move yet because you feel sorry for him.
I don’t know about the poly thing. Just seems like a bad idea to just up and move to Detroit. It don’t even seem like he in a position to handle 4 wives, and plus he’s going to have to take care of y’alls babies too. Just seems like a bad move. There’s going to be some struggle, and it’s cold up there in the D
Not 4, just us 2.
I want to go back to school and work part-time and she wants to work, too. It's really a good thing that we want to, imo.
My biggest issue is not only the weather, but the son we have. I don't feel comfortable with taking him up there and finding a new speech therapist or school, but I know that it can be done with some work. -
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »HundredEyes wrote: »Ol girl fiending for the D out there lmao
Look...youre torn between whats good for you or your baby just says you aint really ? .
Oh I'm definitely not ? .
But we're past that part.
To be fair, he'll still have a dad/male role model.
I'm not fiending...I'm just trying to understand whyyyy I can't have a side ? . Like..it's just sex, bro.
? complicate ? .
keep it 100 an fellas keep it 100.
if you beating down a ? chick....will you not begin to talk down on the ? or look at her a lil crazy for being with a ? she gotta get fed on the side cuz he plate aint full at home. -
-
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »why cant you get a ? an hold the ? at night?
Because she thinks that he's a "nice guy". The minute a woman starts thinking that about her guy it's a wrap.
I actually want him to get another woman, but he doesn't think that she'll go for it.
Besides, who gets jealous over a ? who plays the game all the time???
The fact that he feels that way plays a part in you not finding him attractive anymore subconsciously I'm sure. Now I see why you labeled him a "nice guy". He's at a point in life where he's always afraid to try. Wouldn't be surprised if people pleasing is a priority to him in life and it never should be.
He needs to work on himself cause it sounds like he's got self confidence/self love issues. If he doesn't nip it in the bud that will affect his love life and everything else for the rest of his days. No matter what until that is done every woman he encounters will want to be ghost and as far away from him as possible after a while just like you right now.
I don't believe that some men want to be monogamous.
I'd respect a man more for telling me what he is and isn't built for.
And he's not built for poly-life.
I wouldn't call it 'people-pleasing' but some of our problems stem from the fact that he doesn't want to have an argument. For me, that's an issue. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »
I don't feel like giving DoU this Hebrew Israelite work...I'm cool. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »HundredEyes wrote: »Ol girl fiending for the D out there lmao
Look...youre torn between whats good for you or your baby just says you aint really ? .
Oh I'm definitely not ? .
But we're past that part.
To be fair, he'll still have a dad/male role model.
I'm not fiending...I'm just trying to understand whyyyy I can't have a side ? . Like..it's just sex, bro.
? complicate ? .
keep it 100 an fellas keep it 100.
if you beating down a ? chick....will you not begin to talk down on the ? or look at her a lil crazy for being with a ? she gotta get fed on the side cuz he plate aint full at home.
Welp...looks like we're at an impasse -
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »why cant you get a ? an hold the ? at night?
Because she thinks that he's a "nice guy". The minute a woman starts thinking that about her guy it's a wrap.
I actually want him to get another woman, but he doesn't think that she'll go for it.
Besides, who gets jealous over a ? who plays the game all the time???
The fact that he feels that way plays a part in you not finding him attractive anymore subconsciously I'm sure. Now I see why you labeled him a "nice guy". He's at a point in life where he's always afraid to try. Wouldn't be surprised if people pleasing is a priority to him in life and it never should be.
He needs to work on himself cause it sounds like he's got self confidence/self love issues. If he doesn't nip it in the bud that will affect his love life and everything else for the rest of his days. No matter what until that is done every woman he encounters will want to be ghost and as far away from him as possible after a while just like you right now.
I don't believe that some men want to be monogamous.
I'd respect a man more for telling me what he is and isn't built for.
And he's not built for poly-life.
I wouldn't call it 'people-pleasing' but some of our problems stem from the fact that he doesn't want to have an argument. For me, that's an issue.
could it be that you are TOO selfish?
kinda sounds like you creating a situation to have an excuse. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »
Mmm nah. I don't fwb under 5'7". I might accidentally skeet in her. Can't be having short kids. -
I don't get why you had a kid and all of a sudden he doesn't want to have sex with you. You find that kind of odd did you gain weight or something no diss
-
-
2stepz_ahead wrote: »MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »why cant you get a ? an hold the ? at night?
Because she thinks that he's a "nice guy". The minute a woman starts thinking that about her guy it's a wrap.
I actually want him to get another woman, but he doesn't think that she'll go for it.
Besides, who gets jealous over a ? who plays the game all the time???
The fact that he feels that way plays a part in you not finding him attractive anymore subconsciously I'm sure. Now I see why you labeled him a "nice guy". He's at a point in life where he's always afraid to try. Wouldn't be surprised if people pleasing is a priority to him in life and it never should be.
He needs to work on himself cause it sounds like he's got self confidence/self love issues. If he doesn't nip it in the bud that will affect his love life and everything else for the rest of his days. No matter what until that is done every woman he encounters will want to be ghost and as far away from him as possible after a while just like you right now.
I don't believe that some men want to be monogamous.
I'd respect a man more for telling me what he is and isn't built for.
And he's not built for poly-life.
I wouldn't call it 'people-pleasing' but some of our problems stem from the fact that he doesn't want to have an argument. For me, that's an issue.
could it be that you are TOO selfish?
kinda sounds like you creating a situation to have an excuse.
Ok.
I don't understand how a person can be TOO selfish about what they want/need. -
All I know is the man you are currently with aint making you happy.
Seems like dude dont really care, and even if he does, hes not giving you what you want.
Dont stay with a ? cause hes nice and you care for him etc. The writings on the wall that this relationship isnt gonna work out, the sooner you get serious about that, the better.
I would suggest you sit with him and let him know all this isnt working and how yall envision taking care of your son once you guys split and come to an agreement. Once you and him find a happy medium about how to care for your son, and you can leave him, you can then worry about what to do next.
It could be moving to Detroit and getting into that poly-whatever relarionship or it could be finding a man here and settling down.
The other side of the grass is ALWAYS greener, but once you living it, you'll find yourself running into problems you didnt you would.
For now though, worry about step one, which is how to move on from your current man in a way that is best for your son. -
Wait how sick is he?
How many kids u got by how many dudes
Detroit?
Man yo life sound awful g -
I don't get why you had a kid and all of a sudden he doesn't want to have sex with you. You find that kind of odd did you gain weight or something no diss
Sex isn't high on his list.
It's in my top 5. -
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »
Whats in ur top 5 -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »
Mmm nah. I don't fwb under 5'7". I might accidentally skeet in her. Can't be having short kids.
OhMyGawd -
Imagine living in a house with four women and their kids man. That should just sounds bad
Body bag -
Wait how sick is he?
How many kids u got by how many dudes
Detroit?
Man yo life sound awful g
3x3...9, 4, 3mo
THAT ? moved up there.
I actually want him to move back, tbh. It'd be better for everyone.
Not awful.
Just not what I envisioned.
Believe me..it could be a LOT worse. -
And also, that polygamy is cool on paper, but by law a man can only have one wife. Now you might think who cares about marriage, its only a piece of paper, but it goes way deeper than that.
A wife has legal rights a gf does not. Im talking providing health care for you, tax breaks for you, getting whatever is his if there is a tragic accident, or even worse case, getting half if ? dont work out, plus way more.
Im not saying he should marry you, if he doesnt marry either one of yall its cool, but if he gets married to her, and you just the gf, you taking the short end of that stick and would be stupid to put yourself in such a disadvantageous situation. -
And also, that polygamy is cool on paper, but by law a man can only have one wife. Now you might think who cares about marriage, its only a piece of paper, but it goes way deeper than that.
A wife has legal rights a gf does not. Im talking providing health care for you, tax breaks for you, getting whatever is his if there is a tragic accident, or even worse case, getting half if ? dont work out, plus way more.
Im not saying he should marry you, if he doesnt marry either one of yall its cool, but if he gets married to her, and you just the gf, you taking the short end of that stick and would be stupid to put yourself in such a disadvantageous situation.
Oh..I get it. Even though I'm not an advocate for marriage, I'd do it to ensure myself. -
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »
Y he sick -
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »why cant you get a ? an hold the ? at night?
Because she thinks that he's a "nice guy". The minute a woman starts thinking that about her guy it's a wrap.
I actually want him to get another woman, but he doesn't think that she'll go for it.
Besides, who gets jealous over a ? who plays the game all the time???
The fact that he feels that way plays a part in you not finding him attractive anymore subconsciously I'm sure. Now I see why you labeled him a "nice guy". He's at a point in life where he's always afraid to try. Wouldn't be surprised if people pleasing is a priority to him in life and it never should be.
He needs to work on himself cause it sounds like he's got self confidence/self love issues. If he doesn't nip it in the bud that will affect his love life and everything else for the rest of his days. No matter what until that is done every woman he encounters will want to be ghost and as far away from him as possible after a while just like you right now.
I don't believe that some men want to be monogamous.
I'd respect a man more for telling me what he is and isn't built for.
And he's not built for poly-life.
I wouldn't call it 'people-pleasing' but some of our problems stem from the fact that he doesn't want to have an argument. For me, that's an issue.
-
MoneyPowerRespect wrote: »
What does this mean?
